[Kitten]

My husband took his own life a few months ago. He was not depressed, but he was suffering from insomnia and had stress factors that he had always been able to cope with. Suicide was totally out of character for him. He was given Ambien CR for insomnia and Cymbalta 30mg. for stress. After the 5th day, he killed himself.

Eight years ago, he had a suicide attempt, but had been taking Ambien for insomnia and Lexapro for stress. The suicide attempt was also about 5 days into the medication.

All his life, any other medication he ever took was antibiotics for infections, or nasal/sinus medication. Yet the 2 times he was prescribed antidepressants, he was suicidal within 5 days of beginning the medication.

Has anyone experienced this type of reaction to Cymbalta? When he was prescribed the Cymbalta, he and I both strongly objected, telling the doctor that he had a bad experience with SSRI eight years ago. But the doctor insisted that Cymbalta is a newer drug, a NSRI, and has very little risk of those type side effects. Then the doctor gave us a sample bottle without any of the medication literature, that contains the Black Box Warning. So like idiots, we trusted this doctor and agreed to try the Cymbalta. Fifth day on the medication...

If Cymbalta made you feel suicidal when you first started it, could you please share your experience with me? I'm trying to get my head wrapped around all this and am trying to come to terms and make sense as to why such a wonderfully amazingly awsome man, who always thought that suicide was the worst thing a person could do to their beloved family DID THIS TO HIS FAMILY. I would soooo appreciate any information you can share with me to help me cope with this tragedy and explain it to our children.

[Joh]

Kitten.....I am so sorry about the loss of your husband. I hardly know what to say...... we have much more knowledge and more tools to work with than we did a hundred years ago........but clearly in your husbands case and many others we have a long way to go.

I am again very sorry. I took Cymbalta for five years, and am at the tailend of the weaning process....I hope. Thanks for sharing your story maybe others have, some insight to add to the little that I did. Take good care of yourself.

[Cat]

Kitten, on 11 August 2010 - 12:56 AM, said:

My husband took his own life a few months ago. He was not depressed, but he was suffering from insomnia and had stress factors that he had always been able to cope with. Suicide was totally out of character for him. He was given Ambien CR for insomnia and Cymbalta 30mg. for stress. After the 5th day, he killed himself.

Eight years ago, he had a suicide attempt, but had been taking Ambien for insomnia and Lexapro for stress. The suicide attempt was also about 5 days into the medication.

All his life, any other medication he ever took was antibiotics for infections, or nasal/sinus medication. Yet the 2 times he was prescribed antidepressants, he was suicidal within 5 days of beginning the medication.

Has anyone experienced this type of reaction to Cymbalta? When he was prescribed the Cymbalta, he and I both strongly objected, telling the doctor that he had a bad experience with SSRI eight years ago. But the doctor insisted that Cymbalta is a newer drug, a NSRI, and has very little risk of those type side effects. Then the doctor gave us a sample bottle without any of the medication literature, that contains the Black Box Warning. So like idiots, we trusted this doctor and agreed to try the Cymbalta. Fifth day on the medication...


I am weaning off Cymbalta, was on 120 mg plus 150 of Wellbutrin for over 2 yrs. I fired my drs, dropped myself down to 60 mg for 3-4 wks and found a new dr and am still on the Wellbutrin but have been on 30 mg Cymbalta for 5 wks. I suffer from depression, PTSD but at thje age of 45 I have managed to hold down a very good job, get my B.S. in Holistic Nutrition and have friends etc etc. When I went from 30 to 60 to 120 of the Cymbalta, in less than 8 months I experienced horrific side effects. It was as if something entered my body and mind and told me that life was over, and it was time to die. I fought so hard but it was a struggle, it scared me because I have never actually wanted to die. I have feelings of hopelessness, feelings of sadness and wonder what my future will be like but never had I thought of killing myself. I was scared and told myself I am better than this drug and that I have been thru so much hell in life this would be another chapter and for once, I would control how it ended. What happened to your husband is a lesson in needing to take control of your own health. Like I said, I have lived in this body for 45 yrs and when I was starting to pull my hair out and told myself it was time to die I knew the dr had to go and I needed to drop the dosage right then and in half to 60 mg. I had a few more thoughts of suicide but nothing as overwhelming as the two or three episodes I had and thank gawd the sane side of me called my mom...talk about scaring someone, she thought I was possessed and in a sense, I was and still am until off this completely. I have lost friends, and walked from those I knew I wanted to keep in my life but the thought of explaining my story to another person was too much. I still have people to face that wonder if I am some coke addict or schizophrenic because of my previous actions but since dropping down to 30 mg I am better, still have side effects and days that make me wonder why me but nothing tells me to die.
I am here if you have questions, believe me I was so close to dying and damn Eli Lilly for not controlling this drug. Check out clinicaltrials.gov and under Cymbalta you will see they are still testing it on people over age 24 for depression, PTSD etc.
My heart goes out to you and your childre, and please teach them that they need to manage their own health...not to put their lives in doctors hands and expect them to take care of everything..we need to be involved, ask questions and do our own research.
Luv and Hugs,
Cat
If Cymbalta made you feel suicidal when you first started it, could you please share your experience with me? I'm trying to get my head wrapped around all this and am trying to come to terms and make sense as to why such a wonderfully amazingly awsome man, who always thought that suicide was the worst thing a person could do to their beloved family DID THIS TO HIS FAMILY. I would soooo appreciate any information you can share with me to help me cope with this tragedy and explain it to our children.

[jmmyluvlisa]

My deepest condolences on your loss. You must whole heartedly understand that this had NOTHING to do with you and the family.

I had always been a generally happy, upbeat person. I have epilepsy and need to be on strong anti-siezure meds. At one point a few years ago, I became so deeply depressed and withdrawn that I couldn't even explain it to anyone. When the alarm clock went off in the morning I would cry, just not wanting to face the day. Then, little by little thee horrid thoughts started to drift in and out. Not so much of commiting the act, more of, oh, if I stepped off the curb into traffic, falling asleep and just not waking up. I suppose the "world would just be better off wihtout me" thinking. Shortly after that it got much worse, I got to the point where I was actually considering the idea. At some point I was so broken, all I could do was write on a piece of paper "I need help somehting is wrong with me" and handed it to my husband.
A few days later I was at the doctor needless to say. They put me on Cymbalta and within the first few days I actually thought I was losing my mind. I'm talking full on nuts. And thinking more about that then I was before. It wasn't until the 2nd week of the medicine that, that had started to fade out and I started to "level".
As it turns out, I was on too many medications for my seizures, and it was causing a chemical reaction/ unbalance that had thrown me into the depression to begin with.
I was on Cymbalta for a year and 8 months, came off hard, and am doing alright now.

The doctor's distributing this medication need to be on a tight watch for people who have suicudal thoughts, tendancies, ideas. Like I said the first week was out of control. I think they need to stop prescribing until they have FULL knowledge on the COMPLETE effects of this medicine both during use, and after. I was lucky that I did not go through with my thoughts at the time, and my heart breaks for you and your family.

I don't know if any of that really means anything to you, I'm sure more people have the ideas, thoughts but are too ashamed to say so after.

[kathyl]

Losing your husband must have been very difficult. I believe that he is flying in heaven as an Angel, his wings flowing here and there. He must be gazing down on you wishing you well. Maybe someday, he will visit you, a soft wind on your face, the feeling of his hands running through your hair. I know a smile will come to you and you will know it is him.

I cannot say what he was feeling, I can only tell you how I felt when nothingness entered my soul. The Cymbalta was supposed to take care of that for me and did for a while. Until my insurance ran out. And the fear of returning to the land of the lost.

When I was sick with PTSD and depression after a work injury, I started to think about killing myself. Eventually, I could not get those thoughts out of my head. Every day and minute was focused on how it was going to happen, mostly on the freeway. I would drive into a baracade, I woudl drive my car under a dump truck. I had very vivid thoughts. I couldn't control them. One time, I had to deepbreathe until I made it passed a truck.

These thoughts were not me. I had never thought about suicide before I got hurt.
I worked very hard for 4 years to overcome my fears with medication, therapy and EMDR therapy. With time, I started to get better and healthier. I had a very bad marriage, (he was controlling, tempermental, bitter and cheated alot). He had to go. After my divorce, I had a setback, but got back on track.

I have grown stronger now and when the Cymbalta withdrawals hit me, it really was a test and continues to be of how strong I really am. But I will never give up ever again!

I don't know if I have helped you, all I know is that medication can control you sometimes and can urge you to think and do things you would never do.

Believe, Kathy

[Cat]

kitten, on 10 September 2010 - 06:41 PM, said:

Thanks so much to all of you who have responded to my post. Reading how this drug has personally affected your coping/thinking abilities does indeed shed some light for me. It’s almost likening to my being able to ask my husband "why did you do this?" or "what happened to you?” You all are giving him a voice that speaks out in comfort to me.

My husband was an awesomely amazing man. I was 17 and he was 21 when we met in college. We married 2 years later and were blessed to be happily married for almost 33 years. We grew up and grew old together. He was known to be a man of great honesty and integrity, but his greatest legacy was the absolute and unconditional enormous love, commitment and protection he felt for his family and friends. Especially for me and our 18 year old child that has severe and profound disabilities. His death has been especially hard on this child as there is no cognitive understanding of death. The child feels abandoned by her daddy, and panics when I am not within her sight, fearing I may suddenly abandon her also. Knowing him as well as I did, he would have never left us this way had he been himself.

Suicide was completely and totally out of character for this man who richly loved life, was looking forward to traveling after retiring in a few years and was anticipating with great joy the arrival of grandchildren. I so appreciate your sharing of such personal experiences with me and every post is meaningful and helpful. Perhaps there will be others in my same situation that stumble across this forum (like I did)and will obtain some insight and comfort in your posts as well. Bless you all, thank you and I wish you Godspeed and safe deliverance from this horrible drug!

I have said it before, the more people that go to Erin Brocovich website, under Pharmaceutical will see Cymbalta. She needs people to tell their story of being on cymbalta and the more that do this the better the chances are of getting this drug off the market. Can you imagine the impact if even half, so 2000 people emailed her with what the drug did to them and their lives. You don't know me so I cannot expect people to do this because it would help me out but had your husband asked I would have done so. Only those that have been to the edge and gone below rock bottom; and those that are facing w/d symptoms unimaginable can understand. Again, I am here should anyone need to talk...jerikasteele@comcast.net
luv
Cat aka Jerika