16 replies to this topic

[jndmorton]

This is the Devil's drug...one of them at least.  I am 17 weeks pregnant and have been off of Cymbalta for a week.  My PCP suggested that I just quit cold turkey once I found out I was expecting.  My OB suggested I wean off.  I went from 60mg daily to 30 mg, daily, for about 2 months and just quit taking it a week ago.  I started taking anti-depressants in 2010 for severe depression and anxiety.  After taking Lexapro for about 2 months, I was put on Zoloft 50 mg for 3 months or so then upped to 100mg.  I should never have started taking that crap...EVER!  After 11 months, I just stopped taking it (idk, why...just stupid) and I flipped.  I had to be admitted involuntarily in my local animal hospital's (that is what we call our hospital where I live because it's a joke) behavioral health unit and stayed for 7 days.  When I left, I was back on Zoloft and stayed on it for another 1.5 years.  I started feeling dizzy and light headed all the time, regardless of taking my meds like a good little girl.  My Dr. then put me on 60mg of Cymbalta and I've been on it since.  I found out I was 8 weeks pregnant on September 13 and notified my PCP and OB immediately.  PCP immediately advised I quit the medicine if I could handle my symptoms.  I feel like I can handle my symptoms but I've been CrAzY for the past week and it gets worse as the physical withdrawal symptoms get worse so I'm not real sure I can truly handle my symptoms or if it is just the withdrawals.  I can't think straight and I feel like I've binged on whiskey all night.  I've put my husband through hell.  I feel so bad for being such a monster to him.  He didn't know that I had quit because I didn't tell him and of course he didn't put two and two together.  He threatened to send me back to the hospital again.  After I told him I had quit taking my meds, he was asking me what my doctors had advised (as if he wasn't there for all of the visits) and if I had any left to take for at least every other day.  He did try to help, bless his heart.  The worst part is, I'm pregnant.  I had to quit like I did because I can't bring a little life into this world and have it feeling like this.  I am a big breastfeeding advocate but I'm not going to have a helpless, little baby latched on to me because it is withdrawing too.  I know that is probably a little farfetched but I know that it will feel something that it shouldn't have to feel because of this horrible drug.  When I first started taking Cymbalta, I was told that it didn't have the same side effects/withdrawal symptoms that Zoloft had.  Well, guess what?!?!  It does!  Please, someone, help!  I don't know what to do and no one to talk to who understands.  And no, I did not mean to get pregnant while on Cymbalta:  I came off of a long-term birth control and changed to the pill and Voila!  We had talked about having more kids and I knew I needed to come off of Cymbalta before having another child just based on what I felt when I missed a dose.  I didn't need a doctor to tell me I needed to come off but God had different plans for me, than I did, and here I am.  I was never on anything when I was pregnant with my other two kids so I've never experienced this before, while expecting.  I know this has been all over the place but I'm a little screwy right now and feeling terrible (at work of all places).  I feel horrible for not being more careful while on this medicine so, please, don't judge...I'm feeling enough like shit and don't need outside help.  Encouragement please!!!

[FiveNotions]

:)jnd, welcome! I just sent you a PM ... I'm getting links to other posts about pregnancy and crapalta, and will post them here for you asap

[FiveNotions]

First off, hell no, we're not going to judge you ... every single one of us here got trapped into this poison, for one reason or another ... and the jackass docs have zero clue about it ... what it does to us while on it....what it's like to get off it ... you're going to get nothing but support, understanding, and solid information from us here ... and stay with us ... you can do this, and you can have a healthy and successful pregnancy ... and a wonderful, healthy baby ... so put those fears aside this very moment !

This thread has a post I made in which I included links to a bunch of threads about pregnancy ... start with this ...

https://www.cymbalta...ix/?hl=pregnant

[FiveNotions]

Here's a brief thread, with a very solid response from ThisMoment, one of our previous forum regulars ... it includes a link to a research article ... also, what he said about the doc treating the pregnant member is true ...

I'm not able to stay online right now, as I've got a job to get to ... I'm sure our other members will be arriving soon to greet you and give you more support and advice ...

I'm so happy you found us, please stay with us ... we truly do care ...

[jndmorton]

Thank you!  I'm so happy I'm crying...could be a mix of not having the meds and all of these hormones. LOL  I'm just so happy that I have found someone/people who have been here before and can support me.  Thank you!

[TryinginFL]

Welcome jnd!  You have found a great group of caring and supportive people - we are like a family here!
 
I see that FN has already been at work finding info for you - she is the best at doing this!

 

If you go to our home page and type in "Pregnancy" in the search box, you may find additional info...  You are not the first on this forum to be pregnant with the problem of this devil drug plaguing you.

 

I wish you all the best and others will hopefully hop on here to welcome you as well.  Hang in there and we will help you!  Please start with what FN has already found for you!

 

Liz

[brzghoff]

jndmortn.

 

i just want to say my heart is breaking reading your story - i am so truly sorry for your particular struggle given your need to be off all drugs and unable to wean. the lack of information about cymbalta and anti-d's in general, is truly criminal

[jndmorton]

Thank you, all, for the encouragement!  I'm looking at the info. FN provided and I just read about the study Eli Lilly is doing on pregnant women taking Cymbalta.  I know more needs to be known and there may be some brave mamas out there but I won't subject myself or my baby as a guinea pig.   Sorry, Science! 

[Clara]

jndmorton, welcome! We are so so so nonjudgemental here! We've all been where you are now and will be here with all we have to see you through this! Fivenotions is our topnotch researcher and as she has time from her job, she'll load you up on knowledge! I wish I had the knowledge to help as she does, but alas not! Cymbalta has left me with a very short attention span along with other stuff that is going away slowly! So that being said, I hope you come back often to ask questions, vert, rant, whatever you need to do here! You are in my prayers!

[ZappAlta]

jnd.  My support

[jndmorton]

Thank you, everyone!  I'm feeling so much worse, today, than yesterday.  I know if all of you can make it then I can, too.  Hubs is being very supportive, which helps.  Feel so sorry for my kids.  Wish this feeling would go away!

[TryinginFL]

Awww....jnd,

 

I'm so sorry that today is even worse.  I understand that it is even more difficult when you have kids to take care of.  Wonderful that your hubby is supportive.

 

I just want to mention that there will be times when you just want to be left alone.  Sometimes just a smile from him or a pat on your hand can help immensely!  Since he is being so supportive, I hope that he will provide the help that you need taking care of the kids and the chores.  You will need that.  The mood swings here are pretty intense and you have enough of those right now with your raging hormones.

 

I wish that I had some great advice for you but just know that we are all here for you - please post as often as you need to.  You will find that the support you receive here is invaluable.  Everyone here is at one stage or another of this horrible withdrawal/discontinuation.  I hope that some of the info that FN found for you was helpful.

 

I went cold turkey from 60 mg after a little over 4 years and I truly understand what you are going through.  Please hold on tight - this is a rough ride, and I wasn't pregnant to add to the symptoms.  I don't know what type of relationship you have with your Dr(s), but pray that they can help you through this without anything to harm the baby.

 

Love, hugs and prayers for you,

 

Liz

[jndmorton]

What a weekend!  I was awful to everyone.  My kids, my grandparents, and my husband.  I knew the physical symptoms were going to be bad but I never thought about the mental/emotional ones.  I have been a crazy basket-case.  I was sad, depressed, angry and hostile and still am today.  I feel deflated.  I know a lot of hormones are in play but I don't think that is what is going on now.  I've been pregnant before and I wasn't bat-shit crazy...I wasn't bat-shit crazy with this one until almost 2 weeks off of Cymbalta.  It should be called Cray-balta because that is what it makes you...cray-cray!

 

My kids can't talk to me without me jumping on their backs.  I made my youngest daughter cry and she called me mean.  My heart was broken.  My husband doesn't know how to handle me.  He tries but when I'm being a monster to the kids, of course he's going to stick up for them.  Nothing he says is the right thing.  After I've gone postal and when I "come down" it's like I was in a fog and it all seems like a dream, like I wasn't really there.  I'm just trying to make it minute-by-minute, hour-by-hour, day-by-day at this point.  I'm dreading Thanksgiving.  I'm thinking about making what I said I was going to make and sending it with my husband and the kids.  Bah-humbug!

 

I'll make it.  If all of you did, then I can too!

[jndmorton]

And for the love of Pete, these zaps!  They're making me nuts.  That is why I used Batty Koda (from Ferngully) as my Av because I feel exactly like him.  I tried to post a gif but I got tired of trying.

[Clara]

Bless your heart jnd! My heart aches for you! Breathe, breathe breathe before you talk to the kiddos. I offer this as a suggestion to help aand hope it does. I'm an old fart of 59 and went thru the w/ds without having to deal with a lot of fam or work. I was completely off the crap this time last year but still had some months of craziness. How I made it thru the holidays with shopping, get togethers etc etc was only by the grace of God.  It's all pretty much a blur! You can do this! Stay strong and be easy on yourself! Keep us posted!

[TryinginFL]

jnd.

 

I feel so terrible for you - the emotional mood swings are indeed a real cross to bear. They will improve, but I know - it seems as if it will go on forever.  I can imagine how difficult this is for you with your family to take care of.

 

If I may offer a suggestion, do you think that you can get your hubby to read some of the postings here on the forum?  Brzghoff posted a wonderful article about Coming off the C - it is written in layman's terms, so easy to understand.  It really spells it all out and is the best article I have read about this withdrawal crap.  It is a horrible awakening as to what this is all about and what one goes through during the process.  I wish we could get all the Dr.s to read it!    Please do read it and print it out for your family - I'm sure they love you and want to support you but haven't any idea what you are going through.

 

I wish you the best and will tell you that this "nasty mood" will eventually fade, but you need the help now, while it is affecting your kids.  I know it is difficult, but as Clara suggested -  try to take a few deep breaths to get yourself somewhat under control before speaking to them.  No one wants to be a "mean mommy" and it is not you - it is what this horrible poison is doing to you.

 

Please try to get as much rest as you can and drink LOTS of water!  You might also like to check out the forum on "Nutritional Support".  Many have found help using these things.

 

 

 

 

[FiveNotions]

jnd, the emotional/mental "swings" ... as well as all the physical symptoms ... are due to the huge drop in serotonin level in your brain ... it's one of the most important ... and powerful ... neurotransmitters in the brain ... deeply involved in the entire CNS and how it functions ... Cymbalta artificially elevates the serotonin level, and when someone ... you, me, TFL ... goes "cold turkey" our brains go absolutely haywire because they go from having lots of serotonin, artificially regulated by the drug, to nothing ... and then, the brain has to "re wire" itself and start to relearn how to produce and regulate it's serotonin level naturally again ...

 

This takes time ... the mood swings can be instantaneous ... when I was first in cold turkey, I would go from relatively "sane" to homicidal maniac to sobbing hysterically to laughing hysterically within seconds ... gave me whiplash ...  .... and my poor best buddy, the only person I saw for the first 4 months of cold turkey (I'm an "old fart" and the process took me 4-6 months, you're younger and healthier and are doing much much better than I was) ... anyway, my best buddy came to see me twice a week ... to make sure I was still alive and to make me a huge pot of homemade soup ... anyway .. he simply couldn't believe the speed with which I "cycled" through emotions ...

 

TFL's idea about having your hubby read a few of the posts/threads here is a good one ... another way to help him understand is to explain to him about the serotonin thing ... guys like "objective facts" ... so explain to him about the way crapalta artificially regulates/elevates serotonin ... and that now that you're off the poison, your brain needs time to "rewire" ...

 

We've got some "researchy" type articles here somewhere, let me know if you'd like me to find the links and post them here for you ... you could show them to your husband ...

 

Hang in there ... you're doing this, and you're doing great ... yeah, you're a little nuts right now ... which is "normal" for going cold turkey ... all that's important is that your baby is going to be born healthy and happy ... and you are going to be a healthy and happy new mom