Hi everyone
I've never blogged before or used forums etc, but after doing my research on how bad it can be to withdraw from Cymbalta I wanted to find somewhere I could find support & advice but then also help others along the way too
I'll keep it as brief as I can so I don't bore you all but there's a few things to cover so grab yourself a cuppa lol....
In December 2013 I finally went to see my GP, after months of trying to deal with my rising anxiety/panic/sadness, etc by myself... purchasing endless self-help books and slowly isolating myself from friends & family.
I had been meds free for over a year at that point (was previously on the SSRI Citalopram (Celexa) ) and so I felt like a total failure because I knew I needed some help again but just didn't want to admit it after doing so well for over a year meds-free.
Because I'd been on & off Citalopram over the years my GP suggested we try an SNRI this time and see how I got on.
I was given the choice of either Mirtazapine (Remeron) or Duloxetine (Cymbalta) and due to having lost 4st in weight during my year off medication I opted for Cymbalta as the Remeron had a very high chance of undoing all my hard work!
It took me days to finally take my 1st 30mg Cymbalta pill as I really didn't want to take any drugs again, but I knew I needed to do something as I was so moody & snappy with my fiancé and children, and none of how I was feeling was their fault.
Along with the 30mg starting dose I also asked for CBT (Cognitive Behavioural Therapy) Counselling which I find extremely beneficial.
After doing more research I found out that there is no way to reduce Cymbalta down in small steps like you can with say Prozac for example & started to realise how hard it could be to eventually come off this medication.
So when my GP said about 60mg being the usual dose and did I want to increase I made the decision not to as I felt calmer at 30mg than I did on nothing at all, and I kept in mind the withdrawal process at a later date.
There were times when I wanted to increase the dose and I read that the overwhelming lethargy I was experiencing at 30mg could actually be improved if I upped the dose to 60mg. As tempting as this was (because I was literally living on my arm chair & SO lethargic all the time) I was determined not to increase the amount of this drug in my body/brain so continued at 30mg for a year while I worked on my mind-set, positive thinking, mindfulness, etc.
To make this as short as possible for you all, I'll skip forward one year to December 2014...
I am sooooo fed up of feeling lethargic, tired and just not-bothered about doing anything!!
Despite the main reason for me choosing Cymbalta over Remeron was to avoid gaining back the weight I had previously worked SO hard to lose.... I have gained a whopping THREE STONE in just 12mths being on this medication!
From a very slim, just over 10st, to a very wobbly, uncomfortable 13st 7lbs!! :'-(
As I've gained the weight (it's definitely made me crave sugar & carbs!) I have lost my self-esteem and pretty much spent the whole of 2014 in my house, on my chair! :'-(
Yes, at times it is nice to feel numb where you would have once felt anxiety/panic/guilt/fear etc but I pretty much have no emotions now, I find it hard to cry and sometimes we all need a good healthy crying session to release emotions.
My GP hadn't had much experience with Cymbalta, withdrawal, tapering etc so he dropped me down to the 20mg capsules (the lowest you can get) when I told him I wanted to start coming off them.
I was on that dose for around 5-6wks and then I took matters into my own hands and did some research myself as he didn't seem to know what to do for the best after the 20mgs....
I returned to my GP in January of this year (2015) and said I wanted him to switch me over to Fluoxetine (Prozac) liquid form so I could then much more easily taper off that over the coming weeks/months.
Initially I was going to do every-other-day tapering (20mg Cymbalta, 20mg Prozac, 20mg Cymbalta, and so on) but after the side effects I'd been having over the last few months from the Cymbalta (I'll mention those below) I just decided to stop it there and then and started with the 20mg Prozac.... BYE BYE CYMBALTA!!
Here is a brief breakdown of my short experience so far....
Day1: At 2pm when I would have normally taken my Cymbalta I took the Prozac and all was fine on this day.
Think I was driven by my positivity and determination to get off this stuff!
Day2: Whoozy head that came in waves but quite frequently (like when you forget to take your meds), fluey symptoms like heavy/aching limbs, extreme lethargy and needing to fall asleep so went to bed very early that night.
Day3: WOW!! What a crazy night that was!!! Vivid dreams running very quickly, lots of thoughts, numbers, patterns, movement - like a child's kaleidoscope at some points! My brain couldn't keep up with what my dreams/thoughts were doing BUT it wasn't scary just really weird and I woke up exhausted.
I later found out that the Cymbalta is 99% out of the body after approximately 2.5days which was spot on for me and that's what must have caused the crazy overload/freak-out of my poor brain overnight
Day4: Very whoozy head, dizziness on standing etc, but none of these painful "brain-zaps" I've read about.... so far anyway.
Slept VERY well on night 3!
Day5: Slight nausea, but wasn't sick.
Day6: Upped my water intake, cut back on sugary foods to prevent highs & lows and to try and keep my mind as stable as possible throughout this transition.... ***Advice: STOP any alcohol and coffee/caffeine drinks to help ease/prevent added stresses, highs & lows***
Still slightly dizzy, wobbly on my feet but totally bearable and luckily I don't drive as if I did there's no way I would have during this time.
Day7: For the first time in MONTHS I got myself out of the house and did the school run on foot (my fiancé has been doing it for me whilst I've not felt upto it, his boss is thankfully very understanding) The school run on foot takes just over an hour as the Infants & Juniors are in different schools about 15/20mins away from eachother and is 80% an uphill climb.
My heart was pounding because I'm so unfit (and withdrawing) having hid away for a year but I did it and wow what a sense of achievement! Something so small & simple to others but such a milestone for me :'-)
"The smallest of victories is STILL a victory"
Day8: The 1st week has gone amazingly well, I was so so lucky! But then came a massive 14hr-long headache that paracetamol wouldn't touch. Luckily I had some Co-Drydamol 10/500's in the medicine cabinet but after an hour even these had barely touched it so I had to add 2x Ibuprofen 200's to the mix and FINALLY it began to subside enough for me to drop off to sleep.
BUT I am happy to report that on this day I noticed that the whoozy/dizzy/foggy head had GONE!!
Can't believe it! But not counting my chickens just yet.
Day9: This is the day I am posting this blog and although the headache is looming again and I still feel the lethargy I've felt for the past year, I am so so glad that I followed my heart and put a stop to Cymbalta there and then... I WILL NEVER EVER take it again!
So far the Prozac is working for me and helping to alleviate withdrawal symptoms and I am sleeping VERY well!
I have a long way to go to repair the damage Cymbalta caused to me - especially the 3st(+) weight gain and my poor circulation to my hands & feet.... purpley feet and very pale yellowy/bluey toe and finger nails.... but I CAN & I WILL get through this... and you will too
If anyone has any questions, etc please feel free to ask below and thank you so much for taking time out of your day to read this
Autumn xXx