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Help me understand and help him


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#31 Sarah J

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Posted 09 May 2008 - 12:55 PM

I have had kidney stones too, but low vitamin D if this is part of the cause of his fibro problems, he might have to get the D checked.

Kidney stones come and go pretty quickly, not that you want one because they are crazy painful, but if D is needed to help get over the fibro, then it is worth a shot. I was just saying to not put it into his supplements on your own without the doc involved, because it isn't as safe as taking vitamin C! I am sure if he has a history with stones, they can watch over him somehow!

Don't rule out the test, it might be part of the solution!

#32 Lori

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Posted 09 May 2008 - 01:03 PM

When you speak of Fibromyalgia, I really can not relate. It makes me sad for those of you who deal with it on a daily basis. I really can not imagine nor can I relate to living with Chronic pain. But reading Greybeards post made me think of something.....my boyfriend does deal with pain every day of his life. I give him a massage most nights. I realize that his pain is not Fibromyalgia, his is from living a very wild and risk taking life. He has broken nearly every bone in his body and that includes his neck in 04. I think I am finally clear headed enough to do some extensive research on what I am thinking could be arthritis. He has been to quacks over the years for his pain. I realize from reading Sarah J's posts that he should be tested in regards to his vitamin D, but it makes me wonder if more D could actually help him.

I can tell from reading your post, Sarah J, that you are a very upbeat person and have handled all of this like a trooper. I gain inspiration from you and Schmb01. I thank you so much for sticking with this post. My boyfriend says I lack determination, and maybe he is right. I know I have felt really good this week but I am thinking it is due to the 5-HTP in the supplement I am taking.....even though I realize this is up for debate on here. The ideas and advice you gave Amy are excellent......as was the comment Greybeard made about throwing away instuctions... :lol: But seriously, I felt like I could not think rationally for myself. All the bad thoughts, terrible things ran through my head with no problem, but I had no postive thoughts, no good thoughts. The only thing I could think of rationaly is the fact that I have been so blessed with friends and family, especially family and did not have the mind to be able to appreciate it. When my boyfriend is in a wore down, stressed out mood, I am quick to make sure I cook his favorite dinner. I am secretly changing his iced tea over to decaf. But I never knew how to alleviate his pain except by massaging wherever he is hurting the most. Its time to start looking into that and I thank whatever it was that Greybeard said in his post that triggered it.

You know, Amy, like Sarah J was saying, do what makes you happy in regards to your own life. My boyfriend did that and to be honest, it hurt me, he had a life and I didn't, but I had to find some determination somewhere in order to keep up with him. He was going on with his life, and I was hybernating at home. I felt like I was being left behind, but it did help me to try and get on with some kind of life of my own. I thank you, Amy for posting originally because not only is it helping you and your boyfriend, it has also given me so much insight into my own life. God bless you for your posts.

#33 Sarah J

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Posted 10 May 2008 - 11:02 AM

I can tell from reading your post, Sarah J, that you are a very upbeat person and have handled all of this like a trooper. I gain inspiration from you and Schmb01. I thank you so much for sticking with this post. My boyfriend says I lack determination, and maybe he is right. I know I have felt really good this week but I am thinking it is due to the 5-HTP in the supplement I am taking.....even though I realize this is up for debate on here.

Lori - the 5-htp thing is up for debate here not because it is bad, but it would be irresponsible to say that it would be good to try it without a doctor helping you. It can mess with your brain chemistry big time, so without talking to a doctor about it might give people a reaction that would not be healthy for them.

You are having your doctor look into what you are taking and it is helping you, that is what matters right now.

Thank you for saying that I handled this like a trooper. I did not find this site until I was 21 days into withdrawal. My first post during the first week would have been something like this: OH my goodness curse words- I am dying, I can't do this, I am not going to take Cymbalta again, Why? Lots of curse words here. Why does my doctor keep telling me that what I am feeling isn't real? More cursing. My brains won't work anymore. Curse. Lots of misspelled words to follow with incomplete thoughts. Why can't I walk across the room without grabbing the walls? Curse words here Why can't I put a thought together? Why do I want to sleep all of the time? Curse words here. I can't work and I will lose my clients and business Curse words. Maybe I am crazy as a loon. Curse words. I need to be put into a rubber room NOW, followed by more curse words, What the BLEEP is the brain buzzing in my head, what the BLEEPIN Bleep did Cymbalta do to me?

The reason I kept posting once I got better was that when I looked for information, I could never find a success story. And I was told so many things that were just wrong by my old doctor. Yes, I am upbeat, but in the beginning I was really beaten down. And I know I am a strong person, so this was a really bad time for me. I just want to be able to help one person not suffer like I did. I had nobody to talk to that understood. I did not feel much like a trooper for the first 45 days. I thought it would never get better, but it does and I feel now like I have beaten this. I mean no disrespect to anybody who needs to take antidepressants or any other medication. I knew I had worked through my issues and Cymbalta was not helping me move on with my life. I had read the scary stories of others and thought, that won't happen to me, I have only taken one antidepressant in my life, ever, how could that happen to me? So then I ended up here, which in many ways, talking to others about this helped me realize that I am not the freak of nature I thought I was, I am a human who took a mind altering substance and had a bad time when it was long overdue for me to stop taking it. But thanks for thinking I sound like a trooper, because, I felt like such a loser that this happened to me and took a good bit of time to get over with the help of many people here.

Ya'll - it does get better. Some do it cold turkey with no additional drugs, some like me have to take another antidepressant. Whatever gets you through to the other side. When you get there, don't forget where you got support and give it back to others!

#34 Lori

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Posted 10 May 2008 - 06:12 PM

Hey Sarah J....well you just dont know how you are appreciated. I tease Schmb01 about harrassing me until I came on this site, but honestly, when I first came here, I could not understand how it worked. I would get frustrated trying to understand how to break it all down, read it, and understand it. I stayed on another website forever. I kept popping on here, but my brain just would not allow me to figure out how this site worked. THANK GOD, I kept at it!
I told Schmb01 somewhere else on this thing, that I think, when I use the word debatable or controversial, its more or less because it seems to be working for me, and my boyfriends daughters therapist is going to do some of her own research on the product and 5-HTP. I just did not want anyone else that did not have low seratonin levels, or someone who may end up hindering progress, to try taking this. I guess thats why I say it with my guard up. I dont want someone who may not be thinking clearly, (been there done that....still there sometimes)....to take 5-HTP and think its going to fix their problems or make the withdrawals easier. I am so glad it is working for me...it may be kinda helping me like the prozac did you. I just dont know. I am still confused at times, in a fog, wake up and wish I hadnt, feel anxious when I am around people, but it does not seem to be off the charts like it was.
Thank you for sticking with posting postive things, and the really weird part is......I laughed through what you put in italics....not laughed at, but it made me laugh...I probably could have cried about it a week ago, but not today......I think it is to hear how you used to be and it not being the same person you are today. Anyway, I hope I did not insult you by laughing....just blame it on the withdrawals. ;)

#35 Sarah J

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Posted 10 May 2008 - 06:28 PM

Lori - I have to remember how confused I was when I refer people back to old posts, when I found this site at day 21, it took me forever to figure out where stuff was. I'll have to try to find the old stuff and give people the url link so they don't have to put more pressure on their zapping brain to find stuff.

My italics statement was supposed to make you laugh - no way did you insult me at all!! Seriously though, when I see the new people come on and hear their stories and how many people have their BLEEPED up doctors treat them, this is criminal and not necessary.

I do have a wicked sense of humor :twisted: :twisted: But I realize that most people who come here are in such pain, I was too, so I do try to keep the irony to a minimum. And I was in really bad shape, my first three weeks, I could barely spell anything, which kept me from finding this site!

Smiles to everybody, it does get better. Laughter is good!!

#36 schmb01

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Posted 10 May 2008 - 08:19 PM

Lori! Me, harrassing you? :mrgreen: I'm glad you came over here too. I still go to that other Cymbalta site, as does Lori, and tell people about this place, because honestly, I'm scared for some of them when I read their posts. It is all fresh enough in my mind that I remember how confused I was, and how isolated I felt. I also remember thinking that I had totally screwed up my head and would never be normal again.

I keep posting here because I know that people need to hear a response quickly. There were so few people here back then, like maybe 80, that there wasn't as much interaction. It is wonderful that everyone here has taken such an active role, and are reaching out not only for help, but to help other people too. It restores my faith in humanity.

#37 Lori

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Posted 12 May 2008 - 06:10 AM

I am glad you understood me, Sarah J and I am glad I understood you.....me understanding someone is not one of my best qualities at the moment. Schmbo1, I am like you, it just makes me sad when I read other posts on the other site and I know they need to be here. No, you didnt harrass me, but it felt like it at the time, simply because I could not figure this one out. My mind just seemed so tired, too much to deal with. I always stop at the other website first, before coming to this one. As if I am going to load up whomever needs to come to this site in my car, and bring them safely to this one. LOL

I hope everyone had a wonderful Mothers Day!! We went to dinner with some family members after church, and I seem to shut down. Normally, Sundays I can deal with the people, then we go home, sometimes we go do dinner with my parents, but this was different. Everyone was upbeat, smiling, talkative.......oh GOD were they talkative. I felt myself coming unglued. I think I felt left out somehow, even though it was no ones fault. On the way home, I wanted a Dunkin Donut coffee....I splurged!! Extra extra french vanilla, extra extra sugar, extra cream. :D We were not talking in the car, because I was in a funk. When I went inside to get our coffee, my bf texted me and said, Happy Mothers Day. Thats all it took for me to snap out of it. Then my daughters, husbands, sister and her husband and kids came over to bring me a Mothers Day gift, I shut down again. The kids were having a ball with my BF. And the fact that they love me the way they do, is priceless....I felt so guilty and selfish that their playing and laughing was getting on my nerves, but I tried to keep it together and did a pretty good job.

Mary, I think what started off my yucky mood was because of a NEGATIVE aunt and her son. I think I have mentioned before, I take pictures. I have pictures of my entire Mothers Day weekend on myspace. We do not need to be around negative people while we heal and feel so vulnerable. But if we come across negative posts here, then thats different. This is people reaching out, people who have hit rock bottom, people who think their lives are over. I am here for you as best I can be, and you have my word on that. I strayed from what I was going to say, but my aunt, her son and then they got Grandma talking bad about me and my brother taking picutres....(I overlooked Grandma, she is almost 91) but what I wish I had told them is that I feel as though I am missing out on this part of my life and these pictures are capturing it for me. Too, withdrawals aside, these are good times, times spent with family....and I plan on passing these pictures down to my children. After I took a picture of my negative cousin, I decided not to take one of my aunt, because I did not need two sourpusses on myspace. Aside from letting other people get me down...and thanks to the withdrawals, I had a very blessed Mothers Day weekend.

Ok, so I go over board with my pictures. I have pictures of pots and containers of nothing but DIRT! LOL BUT....I also have updated pictures of those same pots and containers with little green things growing.....meaning, there is hope in my life. Soon those little green things will be flowers AND GREEN BEANS.

#38 Shaggypw

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Posted 12 May 2008 - 07:42 AM

Hi everyone! Well the weekend was good. We were constantly busy is why. There was no time for drama.

#39 Lori

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Posted 12 May 2008 - 10:28 AM

Hey Amy! Great to hear you had a drama free weekend! I hope you had a wonderful Mothers Day!

#40 Shaggypw

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Posted 13 May 2008 - 08:17 AM

Well this morning his lovely new found personality showed back up.

#41 schmb01

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Posted 13 May 2008 - 07:11 PM

Oh Amy!! Well, it is normal for all of this. How long has it been now? I am at the end of day 71, and I feel really stable and the pain is even starting to improve. The pain improvemement could be the vitamin D, as I'm now into week 2 of 50,000 IU 3 times a week.

Another interesting thing, which I will post in the nutrition area too, is that those of us around 40 or so, should also get our vitimin b12 levels checked. The norm is 200-1100, BUT, there was a note at the bottom of my recent labs that reads:

PLEASE NOTE: ALTHOUGH THE REFERECNE RANGE FOR VITAMIN B12 IS 200-1100 PG/ML, IT HAS BEEN REPORTED THAT BETWEEN 5 AND 10% OF PATIENTS WITH VALUES BETWEEN 200-400 PG/ML MAY EXPERIENCE NEUROPSYCHIATRIC AND HEMATOLOGIC ABNORMALITIES DUE TO OCCULT B12 DEFICIENCY; LESS THAN 1% OF PATIENTS WITH VALUES ABOVE 400 PG/ML WILL HAVE SYMPTOMS.

I have talked to other people that have looked into this, and they are finding links to chronic fatigue and other auto immune types of disorders due to low levels of B12. My level is 316. So, I bought some sublingual tabs today.

#42 Lori

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Posted 13 May 2008 - 07:57 PM

Hi Amy, like Schmb01 said, this is normal. Somedays I think I have it licked and here comes the beast again....ME! Oh, how I hate that person. Hate being a harsh word, but this person disrupts my world!!! My BF has been somewhat distant for the past couple of weeks. I have been "good" for 8 days, but this distance thing caused alittle insecurity to come out in me last night. I basically said something I shouldnt have, in a nut shell, and we went to bed not too happy with each other. I am taking his distance personally, but I KNOW he had a rough Mothers Day weekend and the week prior to. I know he misses his friends and coworkers and is now with a different crew that he is adjusting to. Plus they are minus one man and they have to produce the same amount of work without that one man, he is carrying all the bills himself, etc....so I am thinking this is who he is right now. I feel like I dont have his support, but yet, he is here with me, just kinda down and out and still trying to get his 2nd business going and they seem to keep running into one halt after another. I have no idea what this has to do with anything except to tell you we have to hang in there. Keep taking care of yourself and your daughter, dont let the silence rip at the family unit you three are used to. Try to do fun things with your daughter even if its in her room. Thats what I am doing with his daughter.....hey, I am the one who is going through the withdrawal!! But anyway, I seem to be the strong one at the moment and she and I will wait it out til he comes back to his old self again. So I have been spoiling her with alittle extra love and attention...In a way, I have caused some of this havoc in our lives and now, I am able to try and repair them. But when it comes to the pain and fibromyalgia, I am sorry I can not offer any help or advice. BUT I promise to pray, pray, pray. My daughter gave me a beautiful stepping stone for Mothers Day that simply said..."Trust Me, My child, I have it all under control, Love God"......it is so simple, yet its the hardest thing to do. Hang in there, Amy, we are here for you!!!

#43 Shaggypw

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Posted 04 September 2008 - 12:21 PM

Well I guess it is time for an update. He has been completely off Cymbalta for around 6 or 7 weeks now. At around 4 weeks he finally started getting his personality back. It is such a relief to finally be able to laugh and have fun with him again.

#44 Holly

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Posted 04 September 2008 - 12:55 PM

Thank you, thank you for taking the time to post the update! It gives hope to all of us who are still fighting through it. Best wishes for the future!

~Holly

#45 Lori

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Posted 06 September 2008 - 12:18 AM

Thank you for updating us, Amy......I am so happy for both of you.....keep hanging in there, it will get easier each day!!

Best wishes, and God bless
Lori



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