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[freeatlast]

Almost two years ago I went to my GP and told him I was occasionally catching my breath for no reason and that I also would get chest pain on my upper left side (I'm 44 now, male). So he ran a bunch of tests, did and EKG, and surmised that physically I was quite fit and that the problems were stress/anxiety related. I had just bought a company and was working my ass off so it made sense. He asked me if I wanted to get on some pills that would help "balance" me. I said what the hell. I did no research, he told me none of the risks, I just started taking this pill called Citalopram and figured it couldn't do anything but help. Obviously, I had heard of these types of drugs but I had never given them much thought. I was not depressed, I was not in a dark place, I was just really amped up and I wanted the ability to take it down a notch.

Well, the first thing I noticed was that when I exercised I started sweating like a pig. Then my sex drive crashed. That's when I finally went online to see what the hell these pills were. Holy shit. I started reading about all of the side effects and suddenly, one-by-one, I started suffering from them. Like clockwork. So I voiced my concerns to my GP and he simply got me off Citalopram and put me on Celexa. Then Lexapro. Then back on generic Citalopram. Gives me Ambien. I don't even remember it all at this point. All I know was that I was turning into a zombie. Finally, he puts me on Cymbalta. Again, I was NOT suffering from depression, I was NOT suicidal, I did NOT have feelings of hopelessness, I was just wound up. A bit pissy. And then suddenly, I'm the walking dead. Taking naps all the time. Not exercising. Staring at the TV. Now I was calm. But I was too calm. I just didn't care about a lot. And the damn side effects. Ugh. The funny thing is that the side effects caused me to start drinking a lot more than I did before. Now THAT concerned my GP. Having a half bottle of wine at night was this giant cause for alarm but the random chemicals he was having me pump into my brain were no biggie.

I went to a shrink to get a second opinion. He starts in with the "how do you feel" stuff and I am just like "I need to know what these drugs I am taking are doing to me. I feel fine. My marriage is fine, my job is great. But I now sweat like I am in a sauna no matter where I am, being able to have sex is a coin flip, and I no longer feel like who I am. How do I get off it?" So what does he do? Prescribes Ativan and says keep taking the Cymbalta. Christ.

So I find this forum. I read about the unbridled hell that is getting off this stuff. I read almost every thread, trying to come up with a plan. And two and a half weeks ago I went cold turkey. No alcohol, no ambien, no ativan, nothing. God almighty. I didn't get the "brain zaps" but I did get the dizzy thing that I called "The Matrix". Remember the scene in that movie where Neo sees the cat twice? That's what it felt like. My head would move, part of my brain would move, and then the rest of it would catch up two seconds later. That was non-stop. And it's the first day. Then I went to bed. Oh my god. Worst, most vivid nightmares of my life. I was scared to go to bed the next night.

Luckily, my wife was out of town the whole first week. And thankfully I am my own boss so I don't have to be at the office from 8-5 everyday. Because I was gone. It was horrible. But I started one thing immediately. I started walking an hour a day on the treadmill. Which was hell because of the dizzy thing. But it really got my body focused on something other than the somersaults my brain was doing. And I broke down and took an Ambien before bed. I still had nightmares but they didn't wake me up. These two things were big. I used a 0.5 dose of Ativan to chill myself out probably every other day. Someone here suggested Benadryl and I took that but my allergies have been hell anyway so I really can't tell if that actually helped.

But the exercise definitely did help. It's been two and a half weeks and I feel good. I feel like I've chased it out. The Matrix stuff still occasionally happens but it's barely noticeable. Sex drive is completely back, 150%. Sweating is reduced and I definitely have an "edge" back and I mean that in a good way. Suddenly, I am much more productive, engaged, and driven in all walks of life. The little pain is back on my left side. I'll take it.

I am appalled at how easily my doctor chucked me on this stuff. I find it ludicrous that we have all these warnings about booze and recreational drugs but doctors hand out crap like Cymbalta like it's Tylenol. I do hope that the drug has saved someone in some way. But I just don't know how the withdrawal could ever be worth it.

Thank you to everyone in this forum for helping me get off this stuff. There should warning label on every bottle that says "READ CYMBALTAWITHDRAWAL.COM" BEFORE TAKING THIS DRUG".