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#1 Attorney_Victim

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Posted 01 July 2008 - 07:19 PM

Today is Day 2 without Cymbalta. I am a 37 year old female attorney who began taking 60 mg of Cymbalta once a day for depression in May 2007. I stayed on 60 mg for about 9 months before my Dr increased it to 90. She increased it because I reported that I didn't think it was working. That is when I began to experience negative side effects which have culminated in severe withdrawal symptoms. Looking back, I now realize that my depression and overall health started to decline soon after I began taking Cymbalta.

Until 2 days ago, I had been off Cymbalta for 12 days because my Dr switched me to Pristiq and told me (incorrectly) that I would be able to stop the Cymbalta without any problems. But, my withdrawal symptoms got so bad on Sunday that I took a 30 mg pill. The brain zaps, irritability, and diziness were so bad that I thought I was having some sort of mental breakdown. I knew my symptoms were being caused by the cessation of Cymbalta (because I had experienced brain zaps when I missed a dose), but I also thought my depression had gotten so bad that I was having a breakdown. Then I discovered this site and realized I was actually suffering from a serious case of withdrawal!

Although I was not suicidal at that point, had I not taken the Cymbalta that day, I think I could have become suicidal. So, I credit this site with saving my life because it educated me and let me know I am not alone. After reading a few posts on here, I immediately followed GreyBeard's suggestion, and filed an "Incident Report" on the FDA website. I strongly encourage everyone else to file a report.

The only way we are going to help others avoid the dangers of Cymbalta is by speaking out to every agency that will listen. As I posted in another thread, I am looking into the possibility of legal action against Eli Lilly. I don't know if we have a possible claim or not (I am a criminal attorney); I am merely researching the possibility at this point. If anyone has any info regarding lawsuits directly related to Cymbalta, please let me know. When I searched "Cymbalta lawsuit" on Google, it gave me websites for several law firms claiming to be involved in Cymbalta suits. However, I do not know anything about these firms and I am very suspicious of them at this point.

I caution everyone against contacting any of these firms regarding your concerns. Unfortunately, there are many attorneys (and firms) out there that are just looking to make a quick buck off of victims like us. I'm not saying these firms are not reputable, I just don't know anything about them and their sites sent up red flags with me. If any of us decides to pursue a legal action, we need to be sure and choose a reputable attorney (or firm) who has a successful history in product liability/class action suits. Again, I am merely researching the possibility of a lawsuit at this time. If the time comes when I make a decision to pursue legal action, I will definitely let you know.

I saw that there are approx. 1400 members on this site (registered). Does anybody know of other sites, and if so, how many people are registered on that site?

#2 Lori

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Posted 02 July 2008 - 12:42 PM

AV, I hope you have or will let your friends and family members know what you are going through. I had many suicidal thoughts and acted like a very unbalanced crazy person alot of the time. It was hard on my family to see me that way, but they were there for me, checked on me all the time, tried to help in different ways. Like Greybeard said, you will beat this! There are so many differerent things that can help with the withdrawals and most of them are spread out in one thread or another. There were days I could not focus on these posts long enough to find help. But I urge you to keep coming back and taking these posts apart, piece by piece til you find what works for you. It is a terrifying ride but it is worth the ride to rid our bodies of this poison. Everyone of us, who have been where you are now and have beat it....have asked ourselves the same question....are we going to survive this? The answer is YES, YOU WILL!!!!!

MY thoughts and prayers are with you.
Lori

#3 Attorney_Victim

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Posted 02 July 2008 - 05:45 PM

Day 3...symptoms get worse. Mon. and Tues. weren't too bad. I did have trouble concentrating, but overall not bad. This morning, I felt a little sinus pressure/congestion. Then, this afternoon, a headache began. A couple of Ibuprofen took the edge off. But now, the brain zaps are back. I read that 5-HTP helped some people, so I bought some today. After taking a dose, my brain zaps don't seem as bad. I have an appt. tomorrow with my psychiatrist that prescribed the Cymbalta. I am looking forward to discussing my issues/concerns with her and get her reaction.

Lori, thanks for your support. Luckily, I have a loving and supportive family network. As soon as I read a few of the posts on here Sunday, I called my mom and sister and let them know what was going on. They were very understanding and are watching out for me as I withdrawal.

I forgot to mention that today is my first day without the Pristiq as well, so I'm expecting my symptoms to get worse. I am thinking that if my Dr suggests Prozac or something like that to help during the withdrawal, I will give it a try. Mainly, because I had great luck with Prozac in the past for my depression without side effects. Also, my work is suffering, and I really need to be able to function again at work...and I can't miss anymore.

#4 Laurie

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Posted 03 July 2008 - 12:16 PM

Attorney_Victim: there is another large site out there with posts regarding Cymbalta withdrawal: http://www.whatwinne... ... ms/?cp=all . Good luck to you. I'm glad you're off the Pristiq too since it's just another form of the Cymbalta. I'm on day 12 and feeling much better. I still have the brain zaps, but mainly at night or when I'm stressed. I noticed my concentration has gotten much better, as well as the mood swings. I hope you're taking a long weekend and resting, relaxing and being good to yourself.

#5 s.r.

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Posted 03 July 2008 - 05:26 PM

Can someone post the link to the aforementioned "Incident Report" on the FDA website so I can fill one.

#6 kderubeis

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Posted 03 July 2008 - 06:12 PM

I am not computer savy, you may have to cut and paste the address.

http://www.fda.gov/m... ... struct.htm

I didn't even think of this. Way to go Attorney_Victim!! Every person here has something to offer and share that helps forward our cause!! I hope we can all do something that will stop this crazy ride.

#7 s.r.

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Posted 03 July 2008 - 07:23 PM

Thank you for posting that... I ended up there from the FDA's homepage, but if Idid this correctly this link should get everyone straight to the start page for filing a report.


https://www.accessda...atch-online.htm

#8 Attorney_Victim

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Posted 04 July 2008 - 01:51 PM

I wrote a post yesterday, but it's not here...either I forgot to hit submit or something else went wrong. With my brain not working properly, who knows what happened??

Today is Day 5. Yesterday and today have been really bad. Constant brain zaps, nausea is horrible, sinus pain, headache, runny nose. My fingers are really cold and I'm shivering. One minute I'm crying, the next I'm enraged about something. I feel horrible! I'm supposed to go to my sister's with the rest of my family tonight, but I don't think I can make it. I'm going back to bed! Maybe I can just sleep through the worst of this!

I saw my psychiatrist yesterday and she was really understanding. She diagnosed it as ...discontinuation syndrome (or whatever that medical term is, my brain isn't functioning). She felt really bad for me and said she heard from other patients it was terrible. She wanted me to start taking the Cymbalta or Pristiq again (don't remember exactly), but I told her, NO WAY, I wasn't going backwards! I told her I was open to taking something in another category of drug to help with symptoms, so she did prescribe Prozac to help relieve the symptoms since I have tolerated that well in the past. So far, no relief. She said to let her know if it didn't help within a couple days, so I'm praying I will feel better by tomorrow. My Dr thought that a slow taper would've prevented this, but after all my research and reading of other experiences, I don't think it would have helped. So many other people on here say they even broke apart the capsules to taper, but still had these terrible side effects. At this point, I'm convinced that you can't come off this crap without suffering terribly.

Does anybody know of anyone who didn't suffer from these withdrawal effects when they came off this category of drug (whether they tapered down or any other method)?? For the sake of all mankind, I hope there are stories like that out there, but I have my doubts!!

When I feel better and can think clearly, I plan to do extensive research about the negative side effects and withdrawal of this drug. If warranted, I WILL pursue legal action against Eli Lilly!! I encourage everyone on here to document their stories for future reference...either post your story on here, or if you prefer to keep it private, at least keep a journal of some sort. If legal action is pursued, we will need as much written documentation as possible.

#9 BecA

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Posted 04 July 2008 - 02:55 PM

I posted my first time on the "What are your symptoms" thread yesterday. Today is day 6 (I think)off Cymbalta, and I just read the attorney/victim's posts. I had exactly the same symptoms! (though a/v described them better.) Today was really awful, I have been so nauseous, tearful, anxious. Have tried to do just simple things, like eating breakfast (had to lie down), vacuuming one room (had to lie down), loading the dishwasher (had to lie down again). I have seriously considered getting my script refilled today, but don't feel well enough to drive myself. I don't know if I can do this, may have to wean off of this drug slowly. "Cold turkey" has been terrible. I get hungry often, and after I eat, I feel better for a little while, then the nausea and dizziness start again. I wasn't sure what everyone meant by "brain zaps" until a little while ago, when I started having them. Not fun. I'm planning on going over to my brother's with my husband later today, want to do something normal, be normal. I told my husband and my brother what I was doing (stopping Cymbalta), but they don't really understand what I'm feeling. I try very hard to sound normal on the phone and at home. I'm rambling, will end this post. The zaps are getting worse and more frequent right now. Thanks for "listening."

#10 iliao93

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Posted 05 July 2008 - 01:55 PM

I am new & so excited to find this place, words can't express how it feels.
I have some little hope now whereas I was in the depths of hopelessness about getting off this horrible Cymbalta!
I also complained to my doc it wasn't working at 60 and he also increased it too 90!
Then after I felt even worse I did some searching and even on the Cymbalta prescribing
Site it states 90 isn't any more effective than 60, thank goodness I didn't stay at this dose for a long period. I have however been on Cymbalta for over 4 yrs. And recently tried to wean myself very slowly down(on my own)! I also experience the brain buzz...altho I have described it like my brain hit it's funny bone, which is most noticeable to me when I move my head too quickly in any way. I have been having horrible stomach pain, no appetite, weight gain and bloating, shakes,sleeping days on end then not sleeping....so sad and cry about anything.
And the list goes on....but I can't think of them all right now.
I finally managed to go to 30 every 3 days, then I tried to go to 4...big mistake!
I had so many horrible symptoms I have now gone back to 30 per day. But that is an improvement. I am terrified about stopping and at the same time I can't wait to be off completely.
I also take Kadian at 50 mg a day( which I cut myself down to from 100 just before I worked on the Cymbalta) and generic Lortab 750 at 4 x per day for breakthrough.
I have Fibro among other problems like OA & CMP, and ever since I started taking this poison my life has just spiraled out of control.
I am going back to reading more of your posts and will introduce myself better when I have done so, also when I settle down some.
Thank you all for being here and giving me hope and education!

#11 Lori

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Posted 05 July 2008 - 03:15 PM

So many new people coming off of Cymbalta.....it really makes me sad, and it makes me angry. I am sorry you are all dealing with this. Read as many posts as you can in regards to what foods, vitamins and supplements that may help with the withdrawals. Take short walks, do some mild stretching exercises, if you read, watch tv or movies make sure they are lighthearted, or funny with nothing violent. Read the news versus watching it on tv. I will admit, I did sleep through alot of my withdrawal. I just could not deal with it so I slept. It did not kill me and I survived.

For the one who tried to go 4 days without Cymbalta, I encourage you to look at the way alot of other people weaned off the drug. Skipping days, does not work, not with this kind of medicaion (Poison). There are different weaning techniques and Jeff has most of his story posted under 'this has to stop'. He talks of what weaning technique worked for him. His story is very encouraging.

I wish all of you the best! You are in my thoughts and prayers daily.
Lori

#12 Attorney_Victim

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Posted 05 July 2008 - 10:36 PM

Day 6...MUCH BETTER!! Again today, I wrote a post earlier, but it is not showing up...thought I made sure I hit "Submit" this time??!! Oh well, just wanted to let everyone know that after I slept for a few hours yesterday afternoon, I was able to get up and go to my sister's for a 4th of July party. I was still nauseous, had a headache (ibuprofen helped), and mild brain zaps, but I felt much better after the nap!

I slept well last night (thanks to Ambien...which I will deal with later if it is a problem). Woke up today feeling soooo much better!! I'm not sure if I am feeling better because I have been on the Prozac for 48 hrs or if my body is getting over it naturally...I am just glad I feel better! I have had a headache today (but Ibuprofen helps it), some brain zaps (but not as many and not as severe), some sinus pain and runny nose, milder nausea, and still some diahrrea (sp?). I have also experienced some shivering today (like right now).

Emotionally, I didn't experience as much rage today, but I was very "slap happy" this evening...everything my little nephews said or did made me laugh (they are very funny at times...but not THAT funny :D ). Laughing is better than crying anyday as far as I'm concerned!

As Lori said above, sleeping during the worst symptoms is helpful (if you can sleep). I also found that isolating myself in bed and reading a book seemed to keep my mind off the physical symptoms.

Since my Dr prescribed the Prozac and I am feeling better, I would tell others to keep an open mind about taking a different category of anti-depressant during Cymbalta withdrawal. My diagnosis is depresssion and anxiety, so I have tried several other meds over the past 8 years, and I never had any trouble when I stopped taking them until now (I went from Effexor to Cymbalta to Pristiq over 2 years...then to withdrawal HELL :x ).

The most important thing for others to remember is that IT WILL GET BETTER...I wasn't so sure even 24 short hours ago...but I am much better today. Also, YOU ARE NOT ALONE...I can't wait to find out how many "Cymbalta Victims" are out there (not because I hope a lot of others have suffered, but just to prove my theory about Eli Lilly's cover up). Because I'm guessing the numbers are in the ten-thousands...we just have to find them all...many people probably don't even realize it yet (like me as of last Sunday until I found this site).

I hope everyone has a good night and feels better tomorrow!! (I'm going to press Submit now :lol: )

#13 Attorney_Victim

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Posted 06 July 2008 - 08:39 PM

Day 7...Really Great!! Today is the best day I have had since I can remember...which isn't saying much since my memory has been so bad!! I still have diahrrea (less often than before), slight nausea, headache, and a few brain zaps...but my symptoms are even better than they were yesterday. My energy level has been higher today than anytime in the past year...I have done 3 or 4 loads of laundry today...such a simple task, yet I used to only get about 1 load per month done!

I am even looking forward to going to my job tomorrow...I LOVED my job until 6-8 months ago...but then I started feeling extremely negative about it. (Of course, I also started feeling negative about EVERYTHING in my life back then...I just didn't know it was because of the Cymbalta until now!) The past few months, I have dreaded going to work so bad that I can't even describe it...I hated work so much I would leave early ALL the time...literally, almost everyday. I had the vacation time to use, but my supervisor was definitely questioning me about it!!

Somebody else on here mentioned clutter/lack of housekeeping skills...that would be me too. Although I have never been a "neat freak", I haven't had the energy or motivation to clean my house in over 6 months. I used to thoroughly clean my house weekly. The past year, the mail would pile up for weeks, dust accumulated for weeks/months...my house has been disgusting at times over the past 6 months!! Somewhere deep inside, I felt embarassed about my house being dirty, but I couldn't muster enough energy to do anything about it. I am very fortunate because my parents have "loaned" me their cleaning lady twice since December...if they hadn't, I can't imagine how bad things would be!! They offered her services to me two other times, but I turned them down because I couldn't find enough energy to get the clutter stuff out of the way before she came :oops:

Even though I am feeling really good today, I am thinking that I might still have some bad days ahead of me...I hope not, but I am prepared to deal with them.

I learned something important in my research that everyone should be aware of:
The FDA has officially warned against opening the Cymbalta capsules because the "enteric coating" can be affected, and because of "medication errors." The product packaging was changed to include a warning. This warning is published in "FDA Drug Safety Newsletter; Winter 2008."
I know many people on here have talked about opening the capsules to decrease the dosage during taper...make sure you mention this to your doctor!

#14 Lori

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Posted 07 July 2008 - 11:27 AM

Hi AV, Great to hear you are doing so much better now!!! Like Greybeard said, it does not matter if its the withdrawals lessening or the Prozac, either way, it's wonderful!!! I was afraid to go on Prozac simply because of a bad experience with it years ago, although, it was NOTHING like the effects of discontinuing Effexor or Cymbalta. I started taking a Good Days supplement called The Positive Mood Formula and in all honesty I felt like I was cheating because I felt so much better, but Greybeard assured me, I was not cheating. :D I dont think I started the supplement until I had been suffereing from the withdrawals for a month. That was indeed a very long month.

Gosh, doesnt it seem great to actually feel good enough to make a nice dinner for everyone, go work in the yard, clean the house and do the laundry?????? I absolutely could NOT focus long enough to get anything done. I should have listed guilt to my list of side effects but it was not from the Cymbalta really.....but I did not go to my grandsons TBall games, I did not visit them, I stayed in bed all day while my boyfriend worked hard to provide for us, so I was plagued with guilt too. Somedays I would get in the kitchen around lunch time, to start preparing for dinner because it took me so long to get it done. Other days, I would throw something together. When he first met me, he knew a pet peeve of mine was that my kitchen be spotless before my head hit the pillow. He knew I was not up to par when I would leave the dishes til the next day every night. Then it would take every ounce of energy to get them done the next day....but when I got the kitchen clean, I honestly felt like I had accomplished a major task!! But that was about all I could do, clean the kitchen.

Anyway, keep us posted in regards to how you are doing! Glad to hear you are doing so much better!!!!

Lori

#15 Attorney_Victim

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Posted 07 July 2008 - 05:08 PM

Day 8...Good Day! Thanks to everyone for the well wishes, and to Greybeard for the info on the capsules/coating issue...I am not personally doing that method, but I know some people on here are. Today is the first day in a very long time that I woke up without feeling like I had been hit by a ton of bricks!! For the past few months, it has been so hard to get out of bed, that I have been at least a few minutes late to work everyday...today I was early!! (Thank goodness for my great colleagues who covered for me all those times). One colleague today even joked about me being early...she did it in good fun, so I didn't mind. But, I know she is right.

The morning was really good, but my symptoms have gotten worse as the day progressed. Nausea is still hanging around, but with less diahrrea. I developed a headache this afternoon, but it is not that bad compared to a few days ago. I have some cold chills and a "tingly" tongue (a symptom I have had on and off for the past few months, but forgot to mention earlier). Sinus pain and runny nose persist. I've only had one or two mild brain zaps today. My ability to concentrate was much improved today. I didn't feel like I was in a fog. Emotionally, everything was funny today...a little on the "too funny" side. My colleagues and I joke around a lot at work, but I was literally laughing until I cried today at almost everything they said.

Overall, a good day!

#16 BecA

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Posted 08 July 2008 - 10:12 AM

Hi everyone,

This is my 9th day off Cymbalta, and I am gradually feeling better each day--Yeah! Three days ago, I would not have thought that. Still have dizziness and nausea, and that "brain buzz" whenever I move my eyes or head. Something new, though--I have not been sleepy since I got up yesterday morning, and insomnia is not something I've ever had to deal with. Though I have not (yet) called my doctor to let her know what I have done (stopped taking the Cymbalta), I have found ways to feel better (and be more clear-headed) here on this forum (THANK YOU EVERYONE!!!). So, Cymbalta could have been the reason I haven't been able to concentrate at work for months, and perhaps why it would take me so long to get paperwork at work done! The situational depression I had been feeling did get better for a while on Cymbalta, but then I started realizing about December it wasn't really working anymore, in fact, quite the opposite. I thought my difficulty with concentration, and slowness getting things done, was a result of "old age" (I'm only 52), or starting a new job (we moved, and I started a new job about a year ago.)

Here are the things I've read about here in this forum, or discovered for myself, that have helped me get through this awful withdrawal period:
*Taking 400 mg of ibuprofen, as needed---works for the body/muscle aches/headache, but also takes an edge off of the "brain buzz" somehow.
*Taking Zyrtec once every day (regular dose?)--I haven't felt that weird "congestion" and pressure since I've been taking it. Probably works a bit like Benadryl. Helps me sleep, too, I think, at least it did.
*Eating often, even if only a container of applesauce, a piece of toast, a small container of yogurt. If I allow myself to get hungry, I feel terrible. I try not to let my stomach get empty.
*Sleeping when I am tired, whenever that may be. I'm fortunate that I am off for the summer, otherwise, I could not be doing this "withdrawal" at all.
*Listening to relaxing music (such as Audiovisions on XM radio--Directv has it, channel 856).
*Trying to stay relaxed, avoid getting stressed by ANYTHING.
*Keeping the lights low, and the noise level down. My husband has finally realized I am not going to get through this in just a couple of days, and has become very supportive. He turns the TV way down, and doesn't turn on a light near me until I move away. He's been very considerate, like he always is when I get a migraine (I've had them for 20+ years now).
*Sitting outside, or inside by a window, watching and listening to the birds and the wind, just doing NOTHING.

I'm sure I've left off something, but hope writing these things I'm doing here will help someone else. I'm starting to get a little sleepy (have been up for about 26 hours), so I'll sign off now, and try to get some sleep.

BTW, I have continued to pray, and Hope is returning (was it ever really gone?) I say a prayer for all of you I don't even know, that you will soon feel well again, too. For all of you who have recently started feeling better, I am SO HAPPY!! This forum is a blessing, I am so glad I found it!

BecA

#17 redhead

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Posted 08 July 2008 - 12:49 PM

Hi everyone,

I'm new to this site and its so consoling to see all the messages from people that have got thru the Cymbalta withdrawal and are currently working on it. You should be so proud. I started on 120mgs last Sept (after being on Effexor which didnt work) and am currently tapering and down to 42mgs approx. I'm using the tapering method and can defo feel the withdrawals in the last few weeks-no more insomnia at night but very tired especially in the mornings and evenings. I'm trying to cut back on coffee but with my job its hard to concentrate without it.

I have gone thru Effexor withdrawal without the tapering and that was hard-has anyone experienced withdrawal from both- and is Cymbalta withdrawal worse? I remember the effexor withdrawal was hell for a few days and my head felt like a block and I was totally disorientated.

I'm taking vit B complex, Vit C and omega fish oils at the moment and trying to go walking with my dogs in the evening.

Keeping the faith that I'll get thru the journey safely and successfully.

#18 Attorney_Victim

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Posted 08 July 2008 - 08:55 PM

Day 9...Clearheaded. Today has been really good. I did have some slight nausea, chills, maybe one very mild brain zap or two, and I feel very clearheaded!! I am a criminal prosecutor, and I had a trial today, that I won (Yea!)...this is my first trial since things got really bad for me a couple of months ago. Thank goodness I haven't had any trials lately, or I seriously don't know what I would have done...I probably would have ended up losing my job because, I don't think I could have handled it! My apathy was so bad, I literally might have walked out my job one day if the pressure got too bad. And the scary thing is, I wouldn't have cared that I walked out on the job I love :shock:

I chose to go back to law school at 31, and I worked really really hard to get accepted into law school, graduate, and find a job as a prosecutor (because I truly believed in my heart that is what I am supposed to do). I had to apply to law school 3 times because I got wait listed the first two times...then after graduating, I held out a whole year for a prosecution job because I wanted it so bad...yet, 6 months on this drug, and I almost lost it all...after all that hard work.

I am a Christian, and I truly thank God for helping me realize that this drug was "killing" me...if not literally, figuratively! I saw a rainbow on my way to work this morning, and I immediately thought of the biblical story of the rainbow...that it is God's promise to his people. Well, I immediatley teared up because I felt like God was reminding me that he made a promise to be there for me when I needed him (maybe I'm just overly emotional and now delusional, ha ha). I have not been attending church in a couple of years (looking back, it probably coincides with when I started the Effexor then onto Cymbalta...), but thank goodness I never lost my faith. I don't mean to offend anyone on here with my religious thoughts... I just wanted to share my "Rainbow Moment" with all of you guys on here because it gave me hope...religious or not, it is just a really cool thing to see!!

I hope everyone has a good night and feels better in the morning.

#19 Lori

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Posted 09 July 2008 - 05:59 AM

Hi Redhead, welcome to the message board. We encourage you to post and read posts. Ask questions, vent, ramble.....I am sorry to say, I am one of those. :roll: I am glad to hear you are weaning. My thoughts and prayers are with you.

Thanks for sharing your rainbow moment with us, AV. I know exactly where you are coming from. :D
Lori

#20 Attorney_Victim

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Posted 09 July 2008 - 09:44 PM

Day 10...Yucky Day. Today is not as good as the last few. Woke up feeling tired, brain zaps, nausea, trouble concentrating at work. I just felt like I was in a fog all day. But, today is not anywhere near as bad as the first few days...this is very minor compared to last week!! I'm not sure if I remembered to take my Prozac this morning, so if I forgot, that might be part of my problems today. Anyway, I'm going to bed!

#21 Genealogizer

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Posted 10 July 2008 - 10:50 AM

Like Houdi, I am rediscovering my passion for things. I have regained my emotional response to music, art and books. Oddly, I had not been able to focus on anything but light fiction reading since I started C. I have a huge pile of backlogged books and magazines that I didn't want to dump; now I have the time and ability to dig into them. I have even begun rough drafts of a couple of articles - short, but I simply couldn't do it at all for three years, so this is a huge change. Audiovisions is truly great; I discovered it awhile back and I'm so glad to hear it helps others. Sometimes I change to the 60s music channel and sing out loud while I clean or something, scandalizing the animals. Living is becoming fun again. I hadn't noticed it -the fun- slipping away, but I am so glad it's back. Still on Prozac, and I think I'll ask to be put in a holding pattern, not trying to wean off it, for at least a couple of months.

#22 CathyH

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Posted 10 July 2008 - 12:13 PM

Hey AV......Thanks for the rainbow moment. I am a Christian also, and feel very fortunate to have not lost my faith, too. I don't go to church anymore, largely due to being overmedicated for so long, and isolating because of it. I would like to get back.

I had a "rainbow moment" yesterday. It may sound a little wonky, but it meant something to me. I had a freaking awful day yesterday, and at one point, got in my car to go somewhere, and my radio was on. The song playing was All Right Now. You know "All right now, baby, it's all right now". It brought me to tears, but good tears. I felt like God was letting me know it's gonna be okay.

About passion for things. I love to read, have been a reader all my life. I havent' been able to get into a book in some time, and have a stack that just sits there, waiting for me. I have had a total of 19 electroshock treatments (ECT). I had the first series (12 treatments) back in 06. I had another 7 treatments at the end of April of this year. Awful shit. Anyway, the damage caused by the ECT includes inability or difficulty concentrating, and also word retention (amongst many other cognitive problems). So, I'm hoping against hope that some of this damage may get better, and I will be able to read and enjoy it again. If that is not the case, it will be devastating to me. A true loss.

CathyH

#23 Attorney_Victim

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Posted 10 July 2008 - 11:23 PM

Day 11...Best Day Yet! Until 3 days ago, I could barely lift my head off the pillow when my alarm sounded...today, I woke up on my own a full 1.5 hrs before the alarm sounded and I actually felt rested!! I literally can't remember the last time I woke up feeling rested. What a difference, in only a short few days! My energy level has remained good all day. I even mopped my floors today, something unthinkable a week ago.

For all of you suffering through a really bad day (like I was last week on days 3-5), hang in there! In the past twelve days, I think I have experienced every human emotion several times...I might have even invented some new ones. :) Twelve days ago when I found this site, I was at the end of my rope. If I had not found this site, I don't know what would have happened to me. However, I probably would have ended up in a mental hospital because I didn't know what was happening or why I was feeling so angry and miserable. Now, I am in the process of getting my life back.

While I'm not sure how I survived the worst days, I did survive and you will too! I'm so glad to be returning to the "land of the living" after a year of being gone. It's like I took a very long nap, but walked in my sleep...because, I know I did stuff (like go to work, well...most days), but I don't really remember doing it. It's amazing that we all functioned at all on this poison!

It gets better, I promise!!

#24 Genealogizer

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Posted 11 July 2008 - 04:28 PM

This is great news. Congratulations, and I hope you're keeping a journal. I am; looking back, I'd forgotten the daily details including incidents demonstrating my reactions & capabilities. It helps to see in my own words how much more focussed I have become; I was making notes to myself to include on the next day's to-do list, because I couldn't remember a thing without notes. I hope your recovery continues at the same rate, or even faster as you get more of the stuff out of your system.

#25 Attorney_Victim

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Posted 12 July 2008 - 05:39 PM

Day 13...Not Great. Yesterday was okay, but I think I over exterted myself these last few days. I finally felt well enough to get a few things done, and I must have pushed myself too hard. I spent yesterday preparing for a yard sale...I had to cart a bunch of stuff to my sister's house and get it set up (her neighborhood was having a big yard sale so I did it there). I hired my teenage cousin and his buddy to help me, but it was still a lot of work for me...and it was very hot.

Then today I had to get up early...and I woke up tired and not feeling as good as I have been. Then I had to go over to my sister's and have the yard sale in the 800 degree heat and humidity! Some of my withdrawal symptoms have flared up today...a little nausea, a brain zap (mild), irritable (mood swings), and extremely tired (and the "tongue tingling" is really bad today, so I wonder if that is related to deyhydration - which Cymbalta could cause??). I think I have just overexerted myself. So I will treat myself to a night of R and R tonight.

The ironic thing is, the yard sale is actually Cymbalta related...let me explain. As I mentioned on a different thread, I had some sort of shopping and spending obsession/compulsion while on Effexor/Cymbalta. I've always loved finding bargains, especially clothes on clearance for my nephews...but, at some point in the last couple of years, I got obsessed with buying children's clothing and toys at "bargain prices." It started with just buying a few things here and there for my nephews, but it quicly got out of hand!

I started buying tons of girls and boys clothing, and toys. At some point, I started an ebay store to "make money" from all of these bargain finds. Well,that might have been okay if I hadn't kept buying masses of new items!! Not only did I "reinvest" in my ebay business, but I quickly charged thousands and thousands of dollars onto credit cards :shock: I have absolutely no idea how much I spent or made in this little "venture" because I kept absolutely no business records...not even purchase receipts. The spending didn't stop until every credit card was completley maxed out!! Even then, I managed to get money from my parents to feed the compulsion to spend (that's a whole 'nother story :roll: )!

Earlier this year, I was so lethargic and apathetic, I closed my ebay store. I simply did not have the energy or focus needed to maintain the business. But, I still had TONS of toys and kids clothes. After selling a bunch of it this Spring at the local preschool consignment sale, I decided to have a big yard sale in May and get rid of it all. I did sell quite a bit that day, but I still had LOTS of stuff. (At that point I had two 10ft closet rods in my basement which were packed full of clothes...plus toys and a bunch of kids shoes.) So, I thought I would participate in my sister's neighborhood yard sale to get rid of the rest of it.

Well, I worked my tail off these last two days. My head was finally clear, and I had the energy to do it...but, the stuff didn't sell that well. So, at the end of the sale today, I boxed most of it up and took it down to the homeless shelter and donated it!! I simply could not bear the thought of carting all of that stuff back to my house to store AGAIN!! Now that I'm feeling better and I have some clarity, I embarassed about all of this...and I didn't need all of those reminders in my house! It felt really good to donate all of that brand new stuff to people in need, but I took a huge financial loss (even with the tax write off). In order to minimize the financial damage, I did keep some of the name brand stuff to sell in the fall preschool consignment sale (which usually brings in good money). My credit card debt is soooo bad...now that my head is clearing up, I have to make a plan to pay it off. I don't even want to think about the amount of interest I have run up !:(

I am convinced that Effexor and/or Cymbalta caused this whole problem, but I do still feel embarassed. I will be glad when the general public finds out how bad this drug is. Until then, I don't think my friends and family can understand the extent to which it impacted my life!! Who would've ever thought a "medicine" (drug) could ruin a person's life...that only happens to people on "Dateline" or 20/20...right??!! :) Well then, I am "one of those people!" :)

You know, I just thought of something...my sister worked in local media (radio and tv) until she had her second baby 2.5 yrs ago. She still has lots of contacts...maybe I should get the local media involved in publicizing "our" concerns about this drug!! That is probably the only way that doctors and the gov. are going to start listening to our warnings. Publicity would probably help "encourage" an attorney to take our case too. Hmmm...I'll have to give this some more thought!

To anyone out there who is suffering from Cymbalta side effects or withdrawal...it does get better!! And everyone on this board is here to offer support!

#26 Attorney_Victim

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Posted 13 July 2008 - 07:46 PM

Day 14...Two Weeks! It has been exactly two weeks since my last dose of Cymbalta (and 11 days since my last dose of Pristiq) and I am alive and kicking!! I don't feel 100% yet, but I feel so much better now than I did while taking Cymbalta!! The nausea has been with me again today and I feel slightly "foggy" in the head, but it is not near as bad as it was a week ago. I slept almost 12 hrs last night (too much, but I was sooo tired)!

My energy level was pretty good today considering how I long I slept (the more I sleep over 9 hrs, the more tired I feel). I was able to run a few errands and took my nephew swimming. This is the first time all summer I have enjoyed going to the pool with the kids. The last few times, I was so angry and agitated that I basically just yelled at them the whole time. But today, I felt no agitation and had lots of patience! I am definitely starting to feel and act like my true self again, which makes me very happy!!

I hope everyone has had a good weekend and feels a little better each day!

#27 Attorney_Victim

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Posted 14 July 2008 - 07:06 PM

Thanks Houdi for the encouraging words!! I LOVE being "Aunt Sissy" to my nephews!! And, just writing about that whole spending fiasco lifted some of the weight off my shoulders. I've never been great with money...it wasn't unusual for me to "splurge" (go into debt) to buy something here and there for myself. But I've never spent so much money so quickly...and in this case, none of it was spent on me. Once the cards were maxed out, I knew I was in trouble...but, I was deep into the Cymbalta fog at that time, and couldn't even begin to think about how to fix the problem. Now, I know I have to face up to the debt and figure out a way to get it paid off. Now that I have some energy back, I will probably look for a second job to help pay it off. (Prosecutors don't make much money :D )

Day 15...Good Day! The only symptoms I felt today were some very minor dizziness in the morning, and my tongue "tingling" again this afternoon. I think the tongue thing might be related to dehydration....I've never been a "thirsty" person who needs/wants to drink a lot of liquids. In fact, I compare myself to a camel because I do not seem to need a lot of fluids. But, my body seems to be "asking for" more fluids now...and I'm not craving Cokes like I used to.

#28 schmb01

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Posted 14 July 2008 - 09:35 PM

Well, if we lived near each other, we could combine our Ebay "bargains" and hold one heck of a yard sale! My thing was vintage prints, picture frames, silver brushes and mirrors, and purses, with a few other "great deals" along the way. If I wallpapered my entire house with them, I would still have prints and pictures left over. It was a very scary time period. I'll never recoup all of my money, but I know that I have to begin to rid my house of these things. So, I understand where you are coming from!

#29 Attorney_Victim

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Posted 15 July 2008 - 09:12 PM

Schmb01...if our stories weren't related to the Cymbalta poison, they would be humorous :roll: I've been moving the leftover yard sale stuff back from my sister's for 3 days now (a little at a time), and I still don't have it all yet! Grrrr :x

Day 16...Blah. I haven't felt very good today. Nothing specific, just tired. My allergy/asthma symptoms are flaring up. I also think I am "emotionally tired" today. Yesterday, I started doing some research for a work project that entails looking at graphic car crash pics and also reading some intense victims' stories. That really has taken its toll on me emotionally. This project is important to me and it could potentially save lives, but it is not easy to be inundated with those images and stories. I am aware of my extra fragile state right now, so I am carefully monitoring myself. Tonight, I did not allow myself to work on that stuff at all because I knew I needed a break from it. Two months ago, on cymbalta, I could not have handled a project like this. For one thing, I wouldn't have had the energy or clear thoughts to even begin a project, muchless the insight to monitor my own emotional reactions and well-being. So, even though today hasn't been great, it was still better than when I was on cymbalta!!

#30 Attorney_Victim

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Posted 16 July 2008 - 07:14 PM

Day 17...Day 2 without Prozac. I forgot to take my Prozac yesterday, so I decided to stop taking it and see how it goes. Today has been okay. I was pretty irritable at work today with the "enemy" (defendants and defense attorneys). Sometimes my job requires me to be a bi---. Today was sort of one of those days. I wasn't "cranky" with my colleagues. The fact that I was able to direct the appropriate feelings to the appropriate person today is a big improvement. During my Cymbalta induced fog, I seemed to direct inappropriate feelings toward everyone.

I felt some nausea again today with mild dizziness. But nothing too bad. I'm hoping that the worst of the Cymbalta withdrawal is behind me. That is part of why I made the decision to stop the Prozac now. I want to see how I do without any anti-depressants for a while. Even after my terrible ordeal with Cymbalta, I'm not totally opposed to taking them if I need them, but I just want to be sure I need them.



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