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Have To Make A Decision Very Soon..help


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#1 Lundeliz

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    I c/t'd from 60mg in 2009. Went back on and started tapering. Spent the next 4 years trying to get off. It was very difficult. Finally stopped at 17 beads on Dec.4, 2013.

Posted 03 December 2013 - 11:30 PM

Hi everyone.  I have been a member on this forum since 2010, but I can't find my original posting.  I was put on

 

Cymbalta in 2006 when treating for lyme disease.  I guess it was just part of that doctor's protocol.  I quit it cold

 

turkey in 2009.  I had no idea it would make me sick.  The nausea and anxiety were horrible and I went back on

 

the Cymbalta.  I started a slow taper off by removing beads.  It was still pretty bad and I couldn't seem to go any

 

further after reaching 36mg.  I crossed over to Celexa which had horrible side effects for me, but I did a slow taper

 

down on it for over a year and got down to 2.3mg.  Was doing pretty well, when in October I fell down.  After the fall

 

 the anxiety and nausea kicked in and didn't want to go away.  So I switched back over to 30beads of Cymbalta,

 

desperate for relief.  Probably a wrong move.  I have quickly since Oct. tapered down to 17 beads because of the

 

side effects.  I have constant nausea and anxiety, and in the last few days,  my blood pressure is spiking up to

 

200s/100s.  Celexa did this to my blood pressure too.  I need to do something about my blood pressure.  I feel

 

like if I'm going to feel awful anyway I might as well quit the med.  How horrible would my withdrawal be quitting

 

at 5mg?  I know nobody can really answer that.  But would it be a stupid decision?  I have tried Prozac before and

 

felt bad on it also, or I would go that route.  I'm sorry this is so long.   I don't trust my decisions.  I have made some bad

 

ones trying to get off this med.  And I do realize nobody can make the decision for me.  I guess I just want to know that

 

even if I do something wrong, if I can endure the consequences,  I will eventually get through it.  Thanks for letting me 

 

put all these thoughts down.  I'm really scared.


#2 Lad

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Posted 04 December 2013 - 12:55 AM

Lundeliz:

 

First things first, With blood pressure like that you really should get to a medical provider if you haven't. After the ordeal you have been enduring you really don't need the threat of BP induced  physical issues causing you more anxiety.

You are right, only you can decide if the last step is too big for you still but at least maybe they could get the pressure under control and give you the option to continue your slow cessation. Be sure to talk to them about ALL of your meds. Even something as simple as Aleve can cause your BP to spike!

You can do it. Don't be scared.

 

Lad


#3 Clara

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Posted 04 December 2013 - 06:52 AM

Dear, dear Lundliz, we are all here for you and prob' have or have had that fear! As Lad said, take care of the high BP first. You certainly don't need the high bp worry along w/ SINbalta w/drawal. Your own personal circumstances, ie. work, family, home responsibilities will need to be considered in your "coming off" this wretched drug. It IS hard to function normally in the throes of w/drawal. Yous will prob' be similar to all ours, yet different too. Make sense? By all means, post here! Rant, vent, cry, whatever you need to do!! Take care of yourself and keep us posted! I'm beginning to find a sense of humor that I lost or may never have had, due to depression, so dear Lund.... get in a car on our roller coaster and ride with us! clara in sweet Carolina :blink:  :hug:


#4 thismoment

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Posted 04 December 2013 - 08:25 AM

Lundliz

 

See the doc regarding the high blood pressure. Review all your meds. Get stable on fixed dosage. Then consider weaning off 1 bead per day.

 

Best wishes!!


#5 Timbo

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Posted 04 December 2013 - 12:05 PM

Hi Lundiz...I agree with everyone here...you need to get your blood pressure addressed first.  Don't beat yourself up over your choices.  They are behind you now anyway, just move forward.   Also, try as much as you can to not let your mind obsess over this too much.  I have found that anxiety only makes this harder.   

 

If I were you (and I'm not...this is just a thought) I would probably go back up to a number of beads where you weren't experiencing those symptoms and slow down your tapering a bit.   Maybe you could even just drop the count by 1 bead per week until things stabilize - especially your blood pressure.   Who knows, maybe if you could stop some of these symptoms, your anxiety would  be less and your blood pressure could go down.   

 

Do make sure you tell your doctor about any and all medications your are taking.   You never know what interactions could be occurring.   

 

Good luck with this!  I'm sorry you are having such a rough go of it.    I believe things are going to get better for you soon.   :) 


#6 equuswoman

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    In the future want 2B off Cymbalta! The physicians are no help. Looking for understanding, support & encouragement as I know this is a difficult process. Want 2 be of help 2 others who will find this site looking for same things as I.

Posted 04 December 2013 - 06:08 PM

agree w/the above replies. Get that B/P under control...then go from there. I am bead countin' slowly...The ppl here have helped me oh so MUCH when no one else could. TheEquusWoman :hug:


#7 thismoment

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Posted 04 December 2013 - 06:35 PM

Equuswoman

 

Where are you at in the bead count? How are you managing with the pain? 


#8 equuswoman

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Posted 04 December 2013 - 07:04 PM

Equuswoman

 

Where are you at in the bead count? How are you managing with the pain? 

thismoment: I am at 60 down thus far...but having a "bitch"balta kinda day if I am allowed use of that word here on the forum... :(

 

anyway just so irritable, mean, hateful, short tempered, sad, mad, glad  like a "who pissed in your Cheerios" kinda experience at times. All of the emotions anyone could experience I am guessing... :wacko:

 

Saw my pain physician yest then RTC today for a SI joint block. Lotta pain coming from that little ol' joint back there in my butt...lol :o

 

anyway hanging in.... will go back on  12/18/13 @ 9am for the 2nd SI joint block and if relief will then be scheduled for an SI joint radio~frequency ablation in the near future. This does give some pain relief of a percentage for months to poss a year for some. Praying that I fall into that category.

 

Of course I continue to wear out the plastic shell/liner of my artificial hip and that will eventually need to be replaced...oh "joy".... :mellow:

 

had some quite severe nausea this morning but was of course "nothing by mouth" since last MN for the procedure today. 

 

thank you so much for thinking about me. hope that you're doing as well as is possible! :hug:


#9 thismoment

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Posted 04 December 2013 - 08:16 PM

Oh my, that is a tough go! 

 

How many beads in your 60 mg caps?

 

Cyndi Lauper said "Money Changes Everything". So does pain!

 

When you get through with the Zombalta, you will be able to focus on, and attend to the pain. 

 

There is no way through this except by enduring it, one station at a time: It's the closest thing there is to a broken heart.


#10 Lundeliz

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Posted 04 December 2013 - 08:29 PM

Thank you all so very much for all the responses. So much good advice and experience. I probably didn't make

myself very clear, but the high blood pressure I'm pretty sure is caused by the Cymbalta, not the withdrawal.

I could be wrong. I did see my doctor today. He told me to just get off the med, that wd wouldn't last more

than a week. Man, I wish he was right! I've had so many side effects and it's so frustrating trying to figure

out if I need to go up or down or stay put. I just couldn't make myself take the med today. I think I'm just done

with it. I'm at 5mg. I'm terrified, but I'm really trying hard to distract myself. Does anyone think I've made a

horrible decision? I really appreciate the support here. I'll be checking back in soon. Thanks everyone.

#11 Lad

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Posted 04 December 2013 - 08:49 PM

Lundeliz: It is not a horrible decision. It could however lead to things getting worse for a while.

 

I think your treatment provider is like most out there and just doesn't get it! They read their books and regurgitate what they are told; refusing to listen to those who are living it. Next Patient please!

 

The only reason I suggested looking at all of your meds is sometimes things get overlooked and assumptions made based on an incomplete picture. A family member just about ended up in heart surgery over taking Aleve and his provider not connecting dots......... circuitous route but it happened. Ill spare the details but 60 days later he is fine.

 

I don't know if 5 mg will be as bad as from higher doses. I CTed from 30. (on 60, 1 week at 30) it was unpleasant to say the least but from 5 it might not be as bad...... everyone is different for sure.

 

Good luck and people who "get it"  are here for you.

 

Lad


#12 Lundeliz

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Posted 04 December 2013 - 09:02 PM

Thank you Lad. Wow, that's scary about the Aleve. I appreciate the reminder and you are absolutely right.

I will look for your posts to see how your withdrawal went. I hope you are doing well now. I really

appreciate y'all being here for me. I think I will probably be needing y'all.

#13 Timbo

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Posted 04 December 2013 - 10:50 PM

Thank you all so very much for all the responses. So much good advice and experience. I probably didn't make

myself very clear, but the high blood pressure I'm pretty sure is caused by the Cymbalta, not the withdrawal.

I could be wrong. I did see my doctor today. He told me to just get off the med, that wd wouldn't last more

than a week. Man, I wish he was right! I've had so many side effects and it's so frustrating trying to figure

out if I need to go up or down or stay put. I just couldn't make myself take the med today. I think I'm just done

with it. I'm at 5mg. I'm terrified, but I'm really trying hard to distract myself. Does anyone think I've made a

horrible decision? I really appreciate the support here. I'll be checking back in soon. Thanks everyone.

My provider told me the same thing yesterday - that is would only take a week for everything to go back to normal.  I just couldn't risk it.  I have to work and I drive a lot during the day for work.  There is no way I could drive with these symptoms.    Don't be so hard on yourself.  I'm sure all of us have asked ourselves if we made a horrible decision by getting on this stuff in the first place.    We shouldn't have to be figuring this out the way we are, but thank goodness there are people here who have gone before us to offer some wisdom.    5 mg may not be as bad for adjusting (may not take as long).  I'm going down from 60 mg at a rate of 1% per day.  I only have 1 day of experience, so I am just hoping for the best and trying not to focus on it.   

 

If you still feel badly tomorrow, you can always try what some other have tried with tapering off.   After I took the capsule to bring me back up to my original dose (60 mg) after having been on 30 mg for 6 or 7 days, I felt better within an hour.    So...if it gets too much to handle, you can always take your dose (maybe take out a bead or 2).   On the other hand, I'm not a doctor - and your doctor told you to get off of the medication.   You have to do what you believe is right.   No fun, huh?    Hang in there.  Look forward to hearing your success in this process.    :)


#14 thismoment

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Posted 05 December 2013 - 10:06 AM

Lundeliz- good advice from Timbo.

 

Best wishes!


#15 Lundeliz

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Posted 05 December 2013 - 03:51 PM

Thank you for the encouragement Timbo and thismoment.  Second day with no Cymbalta.  I slept and slept

 

last night.  It was good after many nights of barely sleeping.  Today I don't feel great.  My stomach feels

 

tied in knots.  But I feel like there's no going back for me because the side effects had gotten so bad.  I think

 

I'm in it for the duration.  Timbo, you said you have one day of experience.  Does that mean you just started

 

your taper or you just got off?  Good luck to you.  This will eventually end, won' t it?  I'm trying to keep my eye

 

on the prize.  It feels good that I'm not alone in this.


#16 Timbo

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Posted 05 December 2013 - 04:02 PM

Thank you for the encouragement Timbo and thismoment.  Second day with no Cymbalta.  I slept and slept

 

last night.  It was good after many nights of barely sleeping.  Today I don't feel great.  My stomach feels

 

tied in knots.  But I feel like there's no going back for me because the side effects had gotten so bad.  I think

 

I'm in it for the duration.  Timbo, you said you have one day of experience.  Does that mean you just started

 

your taper or you just got off?  Good luck to you.  This will eventually end, won' t it?  I'm trying to keep my eye

 

on the prize.  It feels good that I'm not alone in this.

That's great news that you got some rest last night.  Those sleepless nights make the next day feel a bit bizarre.   

 

I am about to start my 3rd day of tapering.  I'm at the very beginning of this experience.   I don't know what I would have done had I not found this site.   The last 2 days have been very manageable.  The symptoms now are more of an annoyance than anything.   I can handle annoyances.  

 

Yes, this WILL eventually end.  Our brains are basically having to "rewire" themselves.   If what I'm reading is accurate, we are having to regrow neurons.  I bet those "brain zaps" have everything to do with that.  I have been telling myself that with every zap I must have just grown a new neuron.    But I am a bit of a goofball sometimes!    :huh:


#17 Lad

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Posted 05 December 2013 - 05:57 PM

Uh Oh, I must be in trouble then timbo:

 

I thought I was lucky that I was spared the zaps but if it means I gotz no neurons I am in trouble! lololol


#18 Timbo

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Posted 05 December 2013 - 07:17 PM

Uh Oh, I must be in trouble then timbo:

 

I thought I was lucky that I was spared the zaps but if it means I gotz no neurons I am in trouble! lololol

Haha...maybe your zaps happened when you were sleeping.    Or maybe I'm delusional (which is very likely the case...isn't that a symptom of this withdrawal process?). 


#19 Lundeliz

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Posted 06 December 2013 - 09:34 PM

Well, it's the third day with no Cymbalta. I only slept for a couple of hours last night

and I get up at 6a.m. to take my granddaughters to school. I felt pretty good when I got up.

I felt hungry for the first time in a long time. I napped in the afternoon. And since then, I

have not felt so good. I feel very irritable. It feels like my scalp is crawling at times. I

have never had a brain zap, even when I cold turkeyed from 60mg. I'm feeling kinda tingly at

times. It's all bearable, but I wonder what is coming in the days ahead? I'm trying to prepare

myself for it, but I'm really not ready to face it. If I was 100% convinced that I will come out of

it and be back to myself again, it would be so much easier to endure. I guess everyone feels that

way? Does anyone else feel like they are in a fog all the time? I have felt this way for so long.

I hope it can go away too. It may be the symptom I hate most of all. Trying to hang in there!

#20 Lad

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Posted 07 December 2013 - 02:23 AM

Lundeliz:

 

Don't fear what might happen if you can avoid it. As doom and gloom as it may seem you may not have as rough a go this time. CT from 60mg is likely to be a lot different than from 5.

 

I guess what I am trying to say is know how to recognize it for what it is if it rears its ugliness, but don't worry the symptoms into existence. (if that makes any sense?) That cannot be good for the blood pressure either.

 

The fog seems to be a pretty normal one of the withdrawal effects, but as unnerving as it was for me it wasn't horrible. I just quit driving for a while to be safe. Try keeping busy to keep your mind off of your mind. lol I found having a child born in the middle of the withdrawal an excellent distraction! LOL The fog I'd had for a very very long time went away after maybe 3 weeks or so. (I think that was the timeframe but as thismoment puts it, it's just memory stew now. I should have journalled the process but god help me if the pen didn't work or I couldn't find the book...... can you say RAGE??? lol)

 

To quote Red Green, "I'm pullin' for ya, We're all in this together!"

 

Lad


#21 Lundeliz

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Posted 07 December 2013 - 03:39 AM

Thank you Lad. That was a very reassuring post. And I know what you say is true. I'm glad

to hear your brain fog went away. I can't wait for mine to go. I can't help but feel like

withdrawal is just sitting there waiting to attack. But you are right that distraction does

help. I'll make a better effort not to dwell on what might happen. Things have not been too

bad yet, but this evening has been a little rough with the fear and anxious feelings hanging

around. But I know that's right on schedule with being Cymbalta free for 3 days. I'll keep

hanging on! Thanks for the support.

#22 thismoment

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Posted 07 December 2013 - 10:57 AM

Lundeliz, the fact that you can identify or detect the brain fog means a lot. When we're in the thick of it, we can't identify that we would rather be somewhere else. Don't worry, the brain fog will go away. Don't assign a timeline to your recovery. Soon you will feel a whole lot better than you do now.

 

If you tapered from 30 mg over 2 months, the strong withdrawal should be gone, and the brain fog and feeling like you're wrapped in a blanket will slowly lift.

 

Be pro-active and get busy. Make yourself tired.

 

You said, "If I was 100% convinced that I will come out of it and be back to myself again, it would be so much easier to endure."

 

I know exactly what you mean! And you will be back to yourself again.

 

But time has passed, and you've endured some profound experiences- emotionally, physically and chemically. All experience changes the brain. It's logical to expect some palpable subtle differences in 'who' and 'what' we are at the end of that journey. 

 

Therefore, I think it's counterproductive to have a mental 'model' of yourself fixed in your mind's eye, for surely a perfect fit isn't realistic. It wouldn't be realistic even if just the Time alone had  passed.

 

In short time you will be feeling better and better!! Best wishes! Let me know how it goes.


#23 Lundeliz

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Posted 08 December 2013 - 03:40 PM

Thank you, thismoment.  That is very reassuring.  I'm actually doing pretty well considering this is my 5th day without Cymbalta.

 

I was able to go to church today and last Sunday before I had quit my med I was too sick to go.  The brain fog and the spacey

 

feeling is one of my most frustrating symptoms.  I know it's early in the process, and things could get worse before they get better.

 

But then again, maybe not!  I really appreciate all the support I've gotten here.


#24 Lad

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Posted 08 December 2013 - 05:36 PM

Good days are on the horizon for us all Lundeliz!


#25 Lundeliz

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Posted 13 December 2013 - 03:24 PM

I'm looking forward to it, Lad! I'm on my 10th day off Cymbalta. Things are going well.

Nausea and anxiety are pretty much gone. I'm still not feeling like myself, but I hope

that will come soon. Symptoms have all been very bearable. I hope the coming weeks won't

get worse. So far, so good.

#26 thismoment

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Posted 13 December 2013 - 04:59 PM

Lundeliz- just reviewing your history, and you are improving so well!! I'm impressed with your progress, and hopefully the overt symptoms are all gone- zaps, nausea, anxiety etc. 

 

The out-of-sorts feeling may be around for a while, but it will get better.  Staying active really helps because it gets your mind off itself, and activity naturally clears the brain.

 

Best wishes!!


#27 Lundeliz

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Posted 13 December 2013 - 09:03 PM

Thank you thismoment. I really hate the out-of-sorts feeling, but I will try to be patient. Luckily

there is plenty to do to keep busy right now. You're right it does help to distract myself.

#28 Lad

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Posted 14 December 2013 - 12:42 AM

yay Lundeliz, how is the bp?


#29 Lundeliz

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Posted 17 December 2013 - 12:13 PM

Thank you for asking, Lad.  It's still a little higher than it should be, but I'm not having those

 

episodes where it spikes up crazy high.  This is day 14 off Cymbalta.  Symptoms have gotten

 

a little worse the last couple of days.  I woke up with my stomach really tied in knots this morning.

 

The fatigue is bad.  Nothing is unbearable so far.  How are you doing, Lad?  Are you still having

 

wd symptoms and how long have you been off?   Thanks everyone for the support. 


#30 Lad

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Posted 19 December 2013 - 11:55 AM

I'm glad you are doing so well. "nothing unbearable" is great!

 

I am doing ok. I've been off 8 weeks now. The cymptoms are subsiding but honestly it is hard to say. A lot of pain that was being masked (and actually created by) the crapalta is quite severe. (muscle spasms/back pain I never had pre crapalta)

Otherwise, Travelling three flights across the globe to let very elderly grandparents/extended family meet our newborn and everything is just a blur at the moment....... come on new years! lol Finding 10 minutes alone to stop by here without dealing with aging issues/newborn issues and all of the issues in between is a task but I must remember it could be much worse! My first month off crapalta  this would have been impossible! This "aint so bad" lol

 

Keep up the fight!

 

Lad





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