I'm sorry to hear you're being judged by your family, and you're not given the space you require to engage these symptoms effectively-- you need the freedom to cry and mourn and rant in an atmosphere of acceptance, compassion, and love. Can you move out and stay with a balanced and sympathetic friend for a few months?
Ah sorry, no. I have people I talk to online but not really a lot 'actual friends.' I am getting good at 'sneak crying' - though the sniffles usually give me away!
I agree that you need something for the anxiety as it may hang around for quite some time. Do you have a benzo? If you don't want to use that, there is also Hydroxyzine and Clonidine - you can check with your Dr. Another suggestion is Benadryl - many have found that this is a great help with the anxiety and of course, it's an OTC med!
I have Clonazepam (spelling? aka Klonopin). I avoid taking it unless having an anxiety/panic attack, however. I do use benadryl at night to sleep and it helps a lot.
I am really, really tired today. So dang tired. So tired in fact I haven't had time to feel down or depressed. Just tired.
I appreciate all of your continued support.