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Four Days Without


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#1 spaceyP

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Posted 19 December 2016 - 09:26 AM

Hello, everyone!

First of all, thank you for this forum.  The sharing of information regarding this awful drug is so important.  The first time I stopped taking Cymbalta, I did it cold turkey because I didn't know any better.  After a few days, I was terrified that I was having a psychotic break - until I looked online and found you guys.  Anyway, I appreciate everyone who has shared their experiences and especially the folks to keep this forum together.

 

I'll try to give a quick Cymbalta background before I get to where I'm at now.  I've been on 60mg for approximately six years for nerve pain caused by a spinal pars fracture and severe stenosis.  After I'd been on it for a year and gained twenty pounds, among many other unexpected side effects, I decided the costs were not worth the benefits (it did help with the nerve pain, fwiw).  I'd never been on an antidepressant and was quite ignorant of the withdrawal process, so I just stopped taking them.  I had everything - brain zaps and swooshes, migraines, constant crying, suicidal thoughts, severe depressive state, and anxiety.  I remember there was a corner of my couch that I just couldn't move from for days.  Like I said, I didn't know what was going on and it embarrassingly took me too long to put two and two together.  I'd been on and off of narcotics for years and have never once had a single problem with withdrawals, so I just hadn't seen this coming.  (Funny thing is, I started taking this terrible stuff to replace opiates because they make me sick to my stomach no matter how long I take them.)

 

When I realized what was going on that first time, I immediately went back to them and felt fine within a day or two.  Between then (five or so years ago) and now, I've probably tried to (not slowly enough) wean myself off three times.  Maybe four.  Always to end up deciding that I must just accept the fact that I need to be on Cymbalta because the way I feel off it could actually kill me.  Until now...

 

I finally decided a couple of months ago that I can't be on it anymore, and I was going to do what I needed to do to get away from it.  I'm on the generic version, and there are twelve tiny pills inside the capsule (5mg each, I'm hoping).  I can't remember exactly when I started, but I took one "bead" out approximately every week.  I hadn't had a single brain zap, swoosh, or any of the more debilitating symptoms, so four days (down to 20mg - four beads) ago I decided to go "cold turkey."  While I was tapering, I felt like crap, but could still function.  LOTS of fluid retention, bouts of intense nausea, weird skin problems, dizzy spells, yucky digestive tract issues.  I got sick of it, and just wanted to be done with it.  I was/am prepared for the worst.

 

Here's my experience since I stopped altogether...  The first couple of days, I didn't feel much different, and I actually had what I recognize now as bouts of mania.  I was feeling really good for short periods of time, and thought I might be on my way out of this nightmare.  Today, the fourth day, I'm feeling extremely unwell.  Last night, the crying began.  I cried for a couple of hours straight over nothing.  So far today every little thing makes me want to burst into tears or punch stuff.  I have a small red rash at the corner of my eye that's been coming and going since I started the taper, but today it's an angry little rash.  (Last week I had a rash on my chest and stomach.)  My GI symptoms have, let's say, intensified.  The dizzy "spells" are now a constant dizzy state.

 

Despite the uptick in symptoms, I'm dedicated to seeing this through as long as I can still function.  I'm not sure why I haven't had the zaps and the "hearing my eyes move in my head", etc, this time, but those are the things that make it the hardest for me, and I'm grateful I don't have them so far.  I am on some supplements that I wasn't before, but my diet sucks (I know, I know).  I'm taking flax oil, evening primrose oil, a multi, ginger root, l-tyrosine, and l-lysine.  Most of these I take for reasons unrelated to the Cymbalta, but I've also seen that some of them might help.

 

I didn't intend for this to be so long, my apologies.  Thanks again so much for listening.  And for sharing!

 

 

 


#2 fishinghat

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Posted 19 December 2016 - 11:24 AM

Hi SP (I just can't bring my self to call you 'Spacey" lol

 

Those last few beads are usually killers. My recommendation is to get a script for your dr for 30 mg of brand name Cymbalta. These will have around 300 beads in them although you need to check for sure. It will figure out to be around 200 beads for 30 mg. Reinstate at that level by taking out the necessary extra beads (say 100). Once you feel pretty comfortable begin bead counting, I would suggest starting at removing 3 MORE beads a day. So 300 beads total minus 100 beads gets you to 20 mg and then remo ve an additional 2 beads a day. Looks like this....

 

Beads removed

 

100

102

104

106....

 

At anytime things START to deteriorate then stop at the dosage you are at until you emotionally stabilize. Then start dropping again. There is no sense suffering this much. Just give your body plenty of time to adapt.

 

Please feel free to come by anytime and keep us posted, ask questions or just talk. We know how you feel.


#3 spaceyP

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Posted 19 December 2016 - 04:18 PM

Thank you.  If things get bad enough, that's exactly what I will do.  But my insurance won't cover name brand if generic is available, and I work in the US education system, so I'm poor.   <_<

 

Against all of the wonderful advice I've seen here, I'm going to try to stick it out.  I am just so desperate to be completely done.  I never want to see another one of these capsules in my life if I can help it.


#4 fishinghat

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Posted 19 December 2016 - 05:26 PM

Well SP if things get to bad talk to your dr about a prescription for either hydroxyzine and/or clonidine. Neither are habit forming, go to work in an hour or two and have no withdrawal. They may help you cope until things get better. You can also try Benadryl. It may make you drowsy, especially at first but it also helps with the anxiety. Your body gets use to it so don't use it on a regular basis or after a while it will do little for you. Also it can not be taken with hydroxyzine.

 

In addition I would recommend 2000 mg of omega 3 per day, 500 mg of Vitamin C and stay well hydrated. These won't cure the withdrawal but may help some.


#5 spaceyP

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Posted 20 December 2016 - 10:07 AM

Well SP if things get to bad talk to your dr about a prescription for either hydroxyzine and/or clonidine. Neither are habit forming, go to work in an hour or two and have no withdrawal. They may help you cope until things get better. You can also try Benadryl. It may make you drowsy, especially at first but it also helps with the anxiety. Your body gets use to it so don't use it on a regular basis or after a while it will do little for you. Also it can not be taken with hydroxyzine.

 

In addition I would recommend 2000 mg of omega 3 per day, 500 mg of Vitamin C and stay well hydrated. These won't cure the withdrawal but may help some.

Thank you again.  I actually printed this out to take to my family doc if need be.  This is the kind of information they should be giving us.  My family doctor is generally very compassionate and competent, but seems to be fairly clueless when it comes to Cymbalta.  When I brought it up to her a couple of years ago, my spine doctor actually seemed like she couldn't understand why I was having a hard time getting off of it.   :blink:  These are the kinds of things that make this forum so valuable.  I have tried the Bendadryl a few times since reading about it on here, and it has definitely been a big help.  It makes me sleepy, so I have to take it when I don't have much to do, but it is something I never would have thought of.

 

In other news, the rest of Day 4 was extremely challenging.  A lot of dizziness, nausea, GI problems, and heightened emotionality.  I've been forcing myself to work out when I'm physically able, and I can't say enough about how much that helps.  I've always been an athletic person (it's how I fractured my spine, unfortunately), and I know it's difficult for some people, but even a vigorous walk seems to help with the symptoms so much.  After my workout last night, I felt a bit more like myself again.

 

Today is Day 5, and it is good so far.  The GI stuff is much better - I've actually eaten breakfast and not regretted it.  I feel much less bloated.  I haven't had a dizzy spell yet.  I'm not crying or yelling.  Like I said, it's good.  I'm hopeful.  Prepared for a backslide, but hopeful.

 

I'll keep sharing my experience when I can, because this is the kind of thing that has been helpful to me.

 

My heart goes out to anyone going through this during the holidays (or any other time).


#6 fishinghat

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Posted 20 December 2016 - 11:17 AM

"I'll keep sharing my experience when I can, because this is the kind of thing that has been helpful to me."

 

Its helpful to us as well SP. That is how we learn. Thanks for posting and prayers for you.
 


#7 gail

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Posted 20 December 2016 - 04:19 PM

Hello Spacey,

Fishinghat is right about the updates and please continue to do so.

I would like to add that it's not everyone that have long and painful withdrawal. The studies say that between 20% and 30% go through a really hard time.

Who knows, perhaps you are not in that range? I wish that for you.

Should you be in need of special prayers, just ask!

#8 spaceyP

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Posted 21 December 2016 - 01:01 PM

Thank you very much for the support and encouragement, Gail.

 

I am definitely having an easier (not easy) time with withdrawing this time around - it's either my fourth or fifth time, hopefully my last.  The first couple of times were some of the worst physical and mental experiences of my life, and that's saying a lot.  I'm very, very curious as to what the difference could be this time.  I've still had a lot of awful symptoms, but nothing compared to before.  I've been wracking my brain trying to come up with what has changed since then.

 

In any case, I'm on Day 6 of cold turkey-ish.  Felt decent yesterday and today.  I'm still getting really weepy on and off for no reason (I watched Elf with my 8yo last night and cried my face off.   :rolleyes: ), but many of the physical symptoms are gone and/or fading.  Still some dizziness and GI stuff, again on and off.  Was able to work out again last night, which helped again.  

 

My biggest hurdle right now is continuously convincing myself that it's all worth it, and at some point down the road I'll feel "good" again.  I have quite a bit of anxiety over whether or not this drug has permanently damaged my brain and I'll never be back to where I was.  I'm "lucky" enough that I wasn't taking it for depression, so unlike many who go through this I don't have to worry about managing that along with my withdrawal symptoms.  After all this time, though, it's hard to imagine coming out on the other side of it.

 

 

 


#9 fishinghat

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Posted 21 December 2016 - 01:04 PM

You are doing real well SP. The physical symptoms are the first to fade as you have already notice but the emotional ones will go away. Time and patience.


#10 gail

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Posted 21 December 2016 - 04:48 PM

Hello Spacey,

Looking good here! Expect ups and downs along the way for sure.

We are here for you whenever you need to talk, or in need of advice.



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