2761 replies to this topic

[Axlejames]

It's just I'm getting g so frustrated again I feel hopeless like this will never end I felt good for a few days now back to this again

[invalidusername]

This is the recovery pathway. Good days, bad days. 

 

Frustrating is just not enough for me some days. I'm right with you. 

 

Think of your brain like a cast on a broken leg. You just want to tear it off, go for a walk again, move without this massive weight hanging around you.

 

But you just can't. Hence time and patience. Gail and 'Hat will say the exact same thing. 

 

It drags you down and can make the process longer than it could be. Fighting it will bring you more stress and delay your recovery. You will now ask, how do I stop fighting it? That is where I am of no further help, because I am just the same as you.

 

Its like we have someone constantly prodding us. Prod, prod, jab, prod. Arrrggghhh. Just stop it! Until you can't take any more.

[Axlejames]

Amen this is what I'm dealing with I have a full time job a wife who wants a divorce 3 kids who want my attention. How the heck do we recover while trying to navigate it all

[invalidusername]

WOW - mate. This is JUST where I am. Work to do, shopping to be done, wife with agoraphobia to care for. 

 

There is just no letting up is there.

 

Stress is by far the worst. People keep saying to me, take some time off work, all the while forgetting that unless I make £19k a year, my wife gets deported back to her home country. I don't get state benefit, I don't get sick pay (self-employed). Even if I did, they wouldn't contribute to my earnings.

 

Even so, sitting on my ass at home doing nothing just gives my brain more reasons to delay recovery with the stress of not working!!

[Axlejames]

My face is all flushed again and feel like crap it's a nightmare today

[Axlejames]

I feel so empty again today

[Axlejames]

Are we truly an infinite spirit If we are would it be that the thoughts feelings emotions we deal with is a product of our brain if that is true why cant our spirit fight the brain

[gail]

A good question Axle.

Fishinghat, could you give your input on this matter please.

[gail]

Or anyone?

[invalidusername]

Our emotions are indeed a product of our brain, but our spirit, soul or whatever you want to label it, is not of material substance. It is etheric. One cannot intervene with the other in that way. We occupy our physical bodies on earth, and our spiritual bodies on the Other Side. Whilst we are attached to our spiritual bodies (by what most call a "silver chord"), we cannot control one with the other. 

 

The physical body gives the spiritual body a chance to learn that which we do not on the Other Side. If the spirit could fix everything wrong with the physical, there would be no point in us being here as we will not learn any lesson.

 

Furthermore, if we were consciously aware of our spiritual being, this would be conclusive proof of an afterlife, or a deity etc, and aside from throwing the idea of faith out the window, the world would be a very different place.

 

Hope that helps to answer.

[fishinghat]

This is all about a simple chemical reaction. It does not matter what your spirit is, this chemical reaction is governed by laws of chemistry. If a certain size compound (say adrenaline) with an electrical charge in the right places comes in contact with a specific nerve receptor they react. No matter how hard you fight it, you concentrate, develop a good attitude it will NOT change this chemical reaction. If you have too little adrenaline production you are depressed, if you have too much adrenaline production you bounce off the walls with anxiety. You need just the right amount to be stable.

Physical activity requires more energy for movement so adrenaline increases, that is why for anxiety they say slow down, relax and be as calm as possible. For depression they recommend increasing your activity to stimulate adrenaline production. It is all about getting a balance. These same chemical principles apply to dopamine, endorphins, serotonin and other neurotransmitters.

Stressors are OUTSIDE stimuli. They don't start in the brain. They start with detected external sensation. Sight, sound, taste, smell. hearing and touch. These outside forces are perceive by the brain and automatically (you are not in control) produces a response. If you see a train coming at you at 80 miles per hour you will be scared. You can tell yourself not to be scared, you can think positive thought but it doesn't matter. It is a sim ple chemical reaction. period.

[Axlejames]

So basically time and patience when I feel depressed maybe get some exercise when km anxious try to relax I did the math if this is all from withdrawing of celexa then March will be the 6 month mark

[invalidusername]

That is a really interesting post 'Hat.

 

So why do people always talk of "burning off adrenaline" during exercise?

 

I know that cortisol can increase during exercise which is not a good thing for anxiety, but it would be interesting to clear this one up.

 

There is other talk about cardio exercise mimicking the effects of panic (shortness of breath etc), and this desensitises you to the effects of panic. I've not really been an advocate of that myself, but again - just throwing these out there as it has been raised.

 

Axle - try your best not to be timelines on these things. You will get better when you get better. There are way too many factors that can aid or prevent your progress in the next 6 months.

[gail]

AxleJames,

Thanks for bringing this up.

[Axlejames]

I'm just so overwhelmed depression creeps up on me and anxiety strikes before I can even stop it and I just dont know what to do I dont want to go on a new med and I dont want to up my dose it feels like it will be like this forever

[Axlejames]

My wife situation is a hindrance one minute it's like yeah we are working on out relationship the next it's no she still wants to be divorced and then she will be affectionate and then not and I just want to give up all hope but she will say there is a small sliver of hope and I hold on and my heart breaks over and over I'm losing my mind my life feels so torn apart

[fishinghat]

"So why do people always talk of "burning off adrenaline" during exercise?"


First of all that would not work for a severe anxiety attack and second of all if you have a bad day at the office and you are nervous afterward then exercise until tired can decrease serotonin and help relax you.


"...cardio exercise mimicking the effects of panic (shortness of breath etc), and this desensitises you to the effects of panic."

Cardio exercise is aerobic so it can mimic the effects of a panic attack but usually only if you exercise long enough to fatigue the muscles and start building up some lactic acid which reacts with sodium and produces sodium lactate which causes the same types of symptoms. Some researchers actually believe that the sodium lactate stimulates the production of adrenaline and causes true anxiety.


You know I make this sound so matter-of-fact but it is far more complex depending on what is stressing you and what neurotransmitters are being effected. There are other factors like fatigue, oxygen levels which effect blood pH, cortisol, etc etc etc. If it is a true situational panic attack caused by adrenaline then you can have some impact by exercising it and reducing the level as well as "emotionally letting it out' during the exercise. If it is a chronic adrenergic effect then your body has been exposed to high levels of adrenaline for long periods and physical stress, oxygen levels, cortisol, blood pH and much more has been effected to the extent that exercise is just more stress and you will produce more adrenaline with the exercise than you will burn off. The exercise acts as a stressor rather than an emotional vent.


By the way, "desensitises ", bull. Exercise does build up stamina and strength, improve lung function and heart efficiency which helps us cope with stress. Just a matter of conditioning rather than desensitization.

[Axlejames]

I feel alone in this even tho I'm not I appreciate you all my life is so difficult right now

[invalidusername]

'Hat - again, another really interesting post. Read with lots of interest - thank you. Makes a lot of sense, and a shame that this level of detail is not made known in the many many articles written as "exercise being a quick fix" to all mental problems. If it were that simple, then there wouldn't be a worldwide mental health epidemic.

 

Axle - If what you are saying about the "wife" situation is as it reads, then she won't be doing you any favors. You are stuck between a rock and a hard place here. Your head is messed up, and it doesn't need messing up further. You need something solid to base your emotions on here or I worry it will lead you to a more difficult place. To me it sounds like she wants her cake and to eat it to. She wants you there for the convenience of her emotions, but without the commitment. I hate to say this, but that is not the firm basis for a long-term relationship, and was exactly what I went through 8 years ago. I want to be absolutely clear that I do not know all the details here, but going by what you have said thus far, my comments remain.

[Axlejames]

Iun funny having her cake and eating it too were the exact words she used I dont know how or if I want to let go I love her dearly but this is all draining me so much I found my journal I started cymbalta 30mg September 26th and was off celexa for 1 month on September 14th fish can you look at these dates and tell me if I'm possibly still in a transition.period between coming off celexa and the cymbalta getting to it's full effect I'm exhausted a day of racing thoughts hi s and lows and not knowing when this will end

[Axlejames]

Did not sleep that good even tho I sleep for about 8 hours I still wake up tired I dont feel like doing anything today but I must push forward

[gail]

Great way of thinking AxleJames, you surprise me! See you later buddy!

[fishinghat]

"...a shame that this level of detail is not made known in the many many articles written as "exercise being a quick fix" to all mental problems. If it were that simple, then there wouldn't be a worldwide mental health epidemic."

Truly spoken.

Iun funny having her cake and eating it too were the exact words she used I dont know how or if I want to let go I love her dearly but this is all draining me so much I found my journal I started cymbalta 30mg September 26th and was off celexa for 1 month on September 14th fish can you look at these dates and tell me if I'm possibly still in a transition.period between coming off celexa and the cymbalta getting to it's full effect I'm exhausted a day of racing thoughts hi s and lows and not knowing when this will end

This reminds me of an old German saying. 'You can not make someone else happy unless you are happy'

[gail]

AxleJames,

I just had a thought here. It's seems quite stressful with your wife playing you with your mind and now is not good for her to do so, your energy is too low to deal with this.

Do you have a buddy, a sister or brother that could take you in till you mend? You could visit!

Thoughts?

[Axlejames]

Gail no I dont and fish what are your thoughts on my med timelines

[fishinghat]

I agree that given your history that probably around the first of March you should start seeing some improvements. Going back on the Adderall may shorten that some though. Any side effects from the Adderall?

[Axlejames]

Not really I notice around the end of the day my anxiety goes up as the adderall wears off

[invalidusername]

I would hasten to agree with Gail that a little time and space from the "trouble and strife" (English Cockney for "wife" - thought it was fitting) would be great if it were possible.

 

Problem being ADHD and anxiety is like pork and beans, rare to get one without the other. Your adderall has a half life of 9-14 hours, so it won't get you through the whole day. I do not know enough about this drug, but perhaps a split dose or an alternative with a longer half-life?

[Axlejames]

I overthink everything lately it's like I have to analyze everything any ideas why I'm like this

[Axlejames]

Is it possible that my spirit/soul is just farther away from me that's why I cant feel it anymore why I cant seem to find my old fire I feel so hallowed out I know I come here and whine I'm sorry I feel like I repeat myself but this is a complete nightmare for me i just want God to help me to get me through this I just want the Angel's to catch me as I collapse I feel so alone and all I do is think think think why wont it stop I cant quiet my mind ever