Don't be too jealous. I think it was a fluke. I did all the same stuff again last night (although I went to bed a couple hours later) and had a crappy night. I felt very sleepy and fine at bedtime, fell asleep around 1am, woke up at 2am to use the bathroom, fell back asleep, woke up at 6:30am from an anxious dream. Couldn't fall asleep after that, was too tense inside and couldn't relax. I always try to focus on my breathing and count my breaths to chase the anxiety away but it just doesn't work when it comes to sleep.
This week has definitely been a step back in terms of the inner tension and anxiety coming back. I had a stretch of several weeks where I was feeling so much more peaceful and at ease during the day. No chest tightness, no breathing issues, Now I'm all tense and everything feels scary and impossible again. I'm sure it'll pass but the lack of permanence is frustrating. And now I'm back to feeling crappy as a I wait for whatever this phase is to pass. Today I mostly feel like crying which I haven't felt in a while. I have a haircut appt today and going out to dinner with my husband tomorrow. When I made both these reservations a couple weeks ago I was feeling confident and excited about both. Now they're here and I'm feeling anxious and my chest is fluttering and I'm getting jittery.
I'm just so sick and tired of the emotional rollercoaster. The downs don't make me feel like I've lost utter control of my body and brain anymore, so I feel like I shouldn't be complaining, but it still sucks going through stretches of time where for no reason at all you are drained of your mental and emotional strength and feel weak and literally scared of leaving your house for no identifiable reason. i think this is why it's so difficult talking to doctors about this. They make me feel like I have a permanent anxiety disorder but clearly it's kind of intermittent. I feel like they don't know how to address something like this because it's unlike what they typically see.
Mxpro regarding going on another medication, the way I look at it, that option will always be available. There's no rush to say yes. The answer may become more clear with time. You just got off a benzo, I think it's ok to take pressure off yourself to make any major decision about what to do next. Give it at least a month and see if things are changing.