Depression, and certainly anxiety often relate to separation. It's an injury of separation that's perpetuated by more separation, but it's healed within the environment of contact.
We often sabotage the opportunity for healing by driving loved ones away! We say, "Just stay away, I can deal with this myself. I don't want to destroy anyone else's life!" The truth is, we're making both lives worse by creating separation where healing can't possibly take place.
Therefore, we need to create strategies to foster contact.
When we are in pain we hug ourselves, the pillow, the fuzzy bear, the terrycloth monkey. We say, "I'm trying to get ahold of it . . . trying to get a handle on it." We express a yearning for containment and contact. And we say, "I'm holding on," yet there is no one in our arms.
Often it has to start with an apology, which usually travels paired with a promise.
Find a way back into those arms where the real medicine is.