My journey off of Cymbalta
#31
Posted 07 September 2008 - 06:27 PM
Perry
#32
Posted 08 September 2008 - 01:40 PM
Perry
#33
Posted 09 September 2008 - 01:45 PM
Perry
#34
Posted 09 September 2008 - 08:21 PM
#35
Posted 10 September 2008 - 11:41 AM
Day 23: One of the reasons I wanted to get off Cymbalta was that I felt like a zombie with no real feelings… just lived in a daze. Well if yesterday is any indication those days are long gone! I had feelings all right…everything that didn’t go my way set me off like a mad man. That’s putting it too harshly but I did get angry quite often and sometimes at the smallest things. At least now I’m clear headed enough to realize that I need to work on some things that I can change for the better! I have to try to channel my anger into something positive. It’s funny…. In the past few weeks I all of a sudden feel wiser and more mature. Is that something that happens in your mid forties??? Please don’t tell me I’m finally growing up…LOL It’s hard to explain. I don’t know… it’s like I’m gaining a new understanding of my life and my anxiety. It’s weird but good at the same time. Anyone have any thoughts on that? Have a great day everyone!
Perry
That right there is hard to do is knowing how to channel your anger when it comes up. When I upped my dosage of Prozac earlier this week, I felt the anger beast coming back up, and it was bubbling over something that was so ludicrous: there were no Asian restaurants open after 11pm in Vegas (anybody who says this is a twenty-four hour city hasn't ventured away from the Strip), and I wanted some fucking Asian food!!! My wife was with me and we were driving, so I just figured I'd channel my anger by hammering on the gas and finding an upper class restaurant (the only thing in Vegas worth going out late for) and splurging on a really expensive meal like we hadn't had in some time. Once I got a slice of tilapia garnished with lemon juice and mararita spice, I was at peace again.
Dear Devine...thank you so much for your reply. Not only did it make me laugh( not at you but at the thought of you racing thru the streets of Vegas and how it sounds like something I would do) but now I'm craving some asian food too! Hope we both get what we want today! Take care.
Perry
#36
Posted 10 September 2008 - 02:00 PM
Perry
#37
Posted 11 September 2008 - 12:11 PM
Ahhh..... for me it was papers thrown all over the kitchen at 1:30 in the morning......... But yeah yard tools will work too. 8-) I have noticed in myself that some of this anger/rage is really not me doing this, so don't automaticly figure you were to blame for this behavior ....... it's different with the cymbalta than with "normal" anger. When I got hit with the cymbalta anger and went off there was a "logical observer" in my head saying "you know.... you're going to have to pick those papers up now" while the "cymbalta damaged" me tossed some more because that logical one just pissed me off!! :twisted: There were a few other episodes for me and all of them had this same "duality" present during them. Your "olympic javelin thrower" image makes me wonder if you were feeling something similar.
Peace, and be safe with your dose cut this weekend.
Greybeard
Greybeard...I couldn't find the right words to describe how I felt at the time but you hit the nail on the head with "duality"! That's exactly how I felt! By the way I cleaned up my mess yesterday evening and did it without any anger. Thank you for your reply... you always have great responses. Take care.
Perry
#38
Posted 11 September 2008 - 12:15 PM
Day 24: Well it happened again yesterday! After spending a good part of the day online researching ways to make some money (since my condition keeps me from working at this time) I decided to go out in the heat and mow the lawn. All went pretty well until I attempted to put the lawn mower back in the garage and some garden tools decided to get in my way. It was amazing! After the wheel of the mower caused them to fall all over the floor they decided (with a little help from me) to take flight out of garage and land in various spots in the yard. I know what you’re thinking…” how dare they do that”. I thought the same thing! I must admit, it felt good seeing them hurdle thru the air. I was imagining I was an Olympic javelin thrower, which only added to the fun! But seriously, as mad as I got, I quickly realized how foolish I was acting and took responsibility for my actions. Maybe the meds help set me off but it was I who decided to act out. No excuse for that. So later today I will be back in the yard gathering up numerous shovels, tiki torches and planting stakes. I also noticed again that I seamed very exhausted when I finished the lawn. Not sure if it was the heat or the meds. One last note… since it appears that Hurricane Ike is not headed my way, I’ve decided that this weekend I will cut my Cymbalta dosage from 30mg to 15mg. I think it’s time. Wish me luck. Till tomorrow… take care and stay cool!
Perry
Wishing I hadn't splurged the other night because now you've reminded me that I still want some Thai at the very least!
Glad to hear Ike isn't after you and most important of all: good luck with the drop in dosage, mang!
Hey you started it! LOL Now here I sit after reading your post craving asian food again and I'm having a turkey sandwich for lunch today! Life can be sooooo unfair!
Perry
#39
Posted 11 September 2008 - 12:51 PM
Perry
#40
Posted 12 September 2008 - 12:57 PM
Perry
#41
Posted 13 September 2008 - 01:31 PM
Sincerely,
Perry
#42
Posted 14 September 2008 - 04:52 PM
Perry, I take it Ike was a total miss for you? I just read the reports for what happened to Houston and quite frankly, I feel devastated. I want to move back to Texas eventually, but I had somehow forgotten about the hurricanes and the side effects of living in Tornado Alley. At least the season is almost over, right?
Good luck with the cut dosage. The closer you get to zero, the harder it becomes.
On a side note: FINALLY got some Asian yesterday! Picked up some sushi from the grocery store. It wasn't bad, but it wasn't excellent either. Still, it was enough to subdue my cravings. ...jealous?
Hi Divine.... mostly a miss here...lots of flooding due to tidal surge. It was such a large storm it brought lots of water to Louisiana. I live on the Northshore of Lake Pontchartrain in between the cities of Slidell and Mandeville where several neighborhoods had water in homes. Yes the season ends in October I think but it's pretty rare to get strong storms after this month.
And YES I AM Jealous... as crappy as I feel right now...sushi is one thing that I'd be glad to have! Hope you ate enuff for both of us! LOl Later...
Perry
#43
Posted 14 September 2008 - 04:53 PM
Perry
#44
Posted 15 September 2008 - 01:19 PM
Perry
#45
Posted 15 September 2008 - 06:12 PM
Its been hell, I been withouth Cymbalta for more or less 5 days, and this weekend I thought I die or my poor husband would kill me.... Reading all your postings its been a great help. Today was not so bad, and then I decided to grab my sudden energy and started turning the house up side down, well it didn't last long, is like I am a full battery charge, to the top and then it turns down completely, I started feeling dizzy and hyperventilating... so I sat my self down and regroup. When I read your journey and all the things you still go thru every day I can only send you my best and most positive wishes, as greybeard says it will get better, you will get through...
Positive thoughts Carmen from the Caribbean island of Puerto Rico, we also have dodge some hurricanes these season...
#46
Posted 16 September 2008 - 12:51 PM
Things are looking better, except today I told my sister I quit the Cymbalta and she was like WHAT... how could you do that, you know you cannot........ Well she was not the one taking them. I liked what someone on one of the forums said, the drug from hell..... well I am not going back.
carmen
#47
Posted 16 September 2008 - 12:59 PM
Perry
#48
Posted 17 September 2008 - 12:55 PM
Perry
#49
Posted 18 September 2008 - 12:24 PM
Perry
#50
Posted 19 September 2008 - 12:51 PM
perry, your story will help others, you can be sure of that. It's probably a good call about your grandson, don't be too depressed about that tho' next time will be great! Ya' Know? Better to know your limitations right now, and even tho' it pisses you off, accept them. Instead of fighting them and getting in over your head. I can tell by your writings that you know this, but a little reassurance may come in handy.
Best of health, You WILL beat this awful drug!!!
Peace,
Greybeard
Hey Greybeard... thanks for your reply. Reassurance was exactly what I needed! You know how it goes...one minute you feel like your having success and the next you feel like you'll never make it. Your kind words are always helpful and I truely appreciate them.
Thanks,
Perry
#51
Posted 19 September 2008 - 01:15 PM
Perry
#52
Posted 20 September 2008 - 01:35 PM
Perry
#53
Posted 21 September 2008 - 01:45 PM
Perry
#54
Posted 22 September 2008 - 12:41 PM
You're going to be fine Perry, You have come a long way from 60mg so there's something right there and just think.... you won't have to go back! Nine days on 15mg is probably a little soon to expect to level out, it would be nice tho'. Are you taking anything to help with the sleep? Or is the sleep okay but just filled with nightmares? About 4 months ago a lot of forum members were all using "Sleeptime Extra" herbal tea from Celestial Seasonings and it seemed it was working very well for them. (I just reciently got some but haven't had a chance to try it yet.... probably tonight!) I don't think it helped directly with nightmares but they weren't waking up at all hours and were feeling more rested in the morning. The "extra" is Valarian Root which has been used for thousands of years as a sleep and anxiety aid..... Hippocrates use to prescribe it for these and other maladies. It does effect the GABA receptors but very mildly, it may be worth a try.
Pity parties are accepted here, but you will be feeling better soon.
Peace,
Greybeard
Greybeard it's always good to hear from you. You always have great info. I'm not using anything to help with sleep except .5mgs of xanax right before bedtime. I sleep okay but have alot of nightmares and weird dreams that cause me to wake up several times nightly. The same thing happens if I nap during the day. The tea sounds like a good idea but I really don't want to add anything that would effect my brain at this time. I'm really trying to let my body get back to whatever normal is for it. I've taken so many different meds over the years that I can't really remember what drug free feels like. You might just have to listen to my pity parties a little longer. By the way... you are doing great work on the new Cymbalta site! Thanks again and talk to ya soon,
Perry
#55
Posted 22 September 2008 - 02:56 PM
Perry
#56
Posted 23 September 2008 - 01:46 PM
Perry
#57
Posted 24 September 2008 - 01:49 PM
Perry
#58
Posted 24 September 2008 - 02:38 PM
So glad you're doing well! It is so good to know that someone is almost to the end of a journey I just began. It inspires me to know that it can be done!
Keep up the good work, Perry!!
Tam
#59
Posted 25 September 2008 - 11:15 AM
Perry
#60
Posted 25 September 2008 - 11:50 AM
Perry
0 user(s) are reading this topic
0 members, 0 guests, 0 anonymous users