197 replies to this topic

[mkhackler]

I am having so much pain today. Today? Ok, every single day I have pain. Too much pain. It's beginning to depress me so much because I am pretty much house bound. I get up, go directly to tub of fairly hot water (even before coffee) because I'm to stiff and hurting so bad I can't make it downstairs, pop pain pill and wait......

Usually about 10:00 I can move around enough to go out and do quick errands. But by noon, I'm hurting again-all over-and pop a pain pill. Do some things around the house, maybe run another errand and back home. Another pill about 4:00 and another at bed time (along with another soak in tub). Yesterday I was going stir crazy and had to get out, so met son for dinner. But all in all I normally am only out of house for 2 hours a day at most.

Depression is not good. But I know it's because I can't look for work, hardly get out, and very few visitors (none monday-friday). Sometimes I think that health, mental and physical, are getting worse, not better. I phoned a psychologist I use to see before starting with the evil psychiatrist, just to get in for a little counseling. She called back a few days later and left a message saying she would be happy to see me again and to call back and tell her when would be good time. I did. That was about 4 or 5 days ago and haven't heard back from her.

My first appointment with a pain specialist was for today, but it got cancelled on Friday. Found another and am waiting on a call back. Should be no later than tomorrow. I've really got to get a grip on this pain. Without pain med, or just before next dose, or first thing in morning pain in joints and muscles usually anywhere from 6 to 9 (10 is child birth pain).

I refigured how many days now since I quit taking Cymbalta. Last pill was night of April 12th, because on the 13th I checked into hospital due to suicidal thoughts and did not get out until the 14th. So the 14th is when I threw them out but the 12th was actual last dose. So that makes it 37 days now-cold turkey. And I am not seeing a light at the end of the tunnel. Something has got to give, it just has too....

[mkhackler]

i just can't do it.................

[Lori]

You can do this Mary! I am counting on you and praying for you. Please let us know how you are doing today.

[mkhackler]

Ok. Here we go. As you guys know, I have been dealing with tremendous pain in all joints and muscles, along with nerve pain in feet. Along with that has been extreme weakness and fatigue in muscles. Well, last week I started having slight breathing problems, with coughing and the feelings that my lungs have not been expanding as they should. The lung issue has been slowly getting worse, to the point my sternum hurts. And the swelling in the joints of my hands is worse. My concern has been that after, what, 38 days of cold turkey, instead of maybe slowly getting better, I am slowly getting worse. On all accounts. Saw doctor this morning cause really thought I had the begginings of bronchitis. We went over every thing again with the pain and weakness issues. I talked to him again about the correlation between the cymbalta withdrawal and physical pain. Talked to him again about how many people who post on this board have same or similar issues. He admitted that yes, there could indeed be a correlation, but because of the types of pain, where the pain is, and how it is getting worse instead of better, that the cymbalta had been covering up or masking they physical problems while I was on it. He believes that had I not been on the cymbalta, that my pain and stuff would have surfaced prior to my going cold turkey. The way he explained everything, it made sense to me. Even though I was tested for rhumatoid arthritis in the hospital and it came back negative, he said there is a factor that can make the blood test give a negative test for RA. He is pretty much sure that I have RA. And cymbalta kept it from rearing it's ugly head. He absolutely does not want me to go on cymbalta again because of the mental issues I developed while on it. So he is starting with something simple that very well may reduce all of the swelling (which is very visable) in my joints and there for help with the muscle pain, if not take it away all together. If this doesn't work then he will send me to a RA specialist. Although I do not want to have RA, I also can not handle my physical issues anymore. And if he can help me, then I accept any treatment that is offered.

I will keep all of you updated on my progress with the treatment I will be on and how I am feeling. So starting today, day 38 or 39, I am coming back into this with a positive attitude that I am going to beat this. I may have to find a new board to post questions and thoughts, but I will still stay with all of you.

My prayers are with all of you that are suffering. Love to all.

Mary in beautiful Denver

[jeff3298]

Mary, keep us posted.
I am on 10.76mg today,lots of pain today and spacey in the head and a headache. I am starting to see light at the end of the tunnel. I hope this is the worst because this is doable, not comfortable but doable.

I had no joint pain before I took Cymbalta nor during but I sure do now. I believe that Cybalta gives a false signal to the nerves and once you are off it it says hay, where is the pain meds you were giving me and since you are not giving me the meds I must have a problem so I will cause you pain. I am sure there is a medicval term for this but I dont know what it is. False positive Positive Negitive?


Like I said, I am at 10.76mg today YEA! To think I was at 90mg yikes. I am also taking 30mg of Lexapro.

[mkhackler]

i just looked at prescription history at walgreens and i was on 120 mgs a day. just woke up from a nap and fee like ****. bye.

[Lori]

You DO have a life, Greybeard, one that consists of our precious pets and you. When you are ready, you will add more to your already, beautiful life.

[Lori]

I could not even get a one liner post spelled correctly......I meant to say YOUR PETS AND YOU!!!! Sorry GB....

[jeff3298]

9.39mg WOW !
I am doing better today in the pain department which is a good thing. The stress go to me a little today at work but I handled it and didnt blow, I took a short walk outside and breathed some wonderful fresh air and got 2 minutes of sunshine! Came back in my office and felt a million times better.

I see the light, I see the light, Oh Lord I see the Light! (said like Martin Luther King said when he said "I have a dream"

This slower taper so far is wonderful compared to the 30mg to 15mg and the 30 to 0mg. It is not symptom free but it is manageable. Yesterday and today I am having glimpses of my real self, some drove and feeling like I am coming out of a cave. They are glimpses and short periods but they are refreshing none the less. Even if they last for a minute that is fine, it is a reality check, gives me hope.

About one week to go at the taper rate and I will be off Killbalta. I wondered many times if I would ever be this close.

1. Remember it is not you that caused this, it is the drug!
2. You are not crazy, you are not alone, we understand what you are going through, we have gone through it also.

Blessings,
Jeff

[Lori]

There is alot to be said for SUNSHINE!!! I am so happy for you Jeff!!! Keep hanging in there, staying focused, you can are ARE DOING THIS!!!!! God bless you, Jeff!!!

[mkhackler]

Jeff-It is so wonderful to hear the success stories on this board. And you ARE a success. The light will get closer closer and closer. Keep up the hard work!

As I posted it seems I do have RA, which I started developing while on cymbalta. Could it be that the cymbalta can cause RA in many of us? Doc put me on a prednisone burst, today is the 3rd day for it I have to say I see so much improvement already. He said I would start feeling better by weekend, and I am. It really screws with my sleep though. But that I can handle. Still having nerve pain in feet and fingers, and feet are especially bad, but hoping that that will also soon improve.

Will keep all up to date on progress. Am anxious to see if pain returns as soon as my "burst" of prednisone is over which will be in about a week.

Take care all.

[judysworld]

Good morning all -

It's been a few weeks since I've posted on this board, and it's been 4 weeks since I stopped the Cymbalta. I can say that most of the withdrawal stuff is over for me now. (Huge sigh) The colitis that the drug caused has stopped, the dizziness has subsided tremendously, I don't feel nauseated anymore, the moodiness is getting better. (another hugh sigh) Still have the 'brain zaps,' though not as frequently. The pain from the fibroneuralgia came back two-fold at first, but I think my system is relearning how to deal with the pain, so it's getting a bit better.

I had an appointment with my neurologist (who initially prescribed the drug for my fibroneuralgia) and told him of all of the withdrawal symptoms. He said that because of what I and other patients have been telling him, that he's a lot more cautious in prescribing the drug, and he's been in touch with the drug reps who recommended the stuff, and has been reporting all of the side effects his patients tell him about to the FDA. I was glad to hear that. If what I went through can prevent others from having to experience this BS, then I feel a little bit better.

[mkhackler]

Hi Judysworld-Glad to hear that someone has a doctor who has listened to his/her patients complaints about this drug and that they themselves are doing things about it. I left a very nasty message on my ex phsyciatrists phone that he had better think twice before prescribing this stuff to anyone, and to take a close hard look at the evidence on this board and other websites. I doubt that he will care.

[judysworld]

Hi Mkhackler -

Yeah, it's great having a good neurologist ..... BUT I had to go through 3 others in 3 years to find him. It's almost an oxymoron .... a physician with a heart who knows how to listen? And one who actually BELIEVES you??? Almost unheard of in that profession these days. I can't think of anything more sad........

[jeff3298]

8.02mg Today.
It is a good day, yes that’s what I said a GOOD Day. Very little pain or headache or fuzzy head. I would like to say the worst is over but I am not going to go there until months from now. This slower taper has been manageable and doable. A few rough days but nothing like cold turkey or even the larger drop in mg.

I encourage anyone that is considering going off this to do the slower taper; your body will appreciate it much more. I went to fast going from 30mg. to 15mg. it was too big a jump from my brain and body to handle. Going from 30mg to zero was a horror story which you can read elsewhere on this site on my first few post.

This drug is very powerful, it did a wonderful thing when I first took it and made my life livable again. I tried many antidepressants and nothing worked like this one did. I really gave me my life back. But then after the first year I started have those suicidal thoughts and the time I went cold turkey for 5 days because of a pharmacy mix up I knew I had to get off this stuff.

If you are new to this site, welcome. Read and read and read all our stories and know that you are not alone, you are not crazy, and you are not stupid because your doctor says it cannot happen. My doctor told me flat out this drug does not have withdrawal effects and acted like I was an idiot for saying it did.

I will keep posting and doing whatever I can to help others on this drug. I will tell my story to whoever will listen. I will help where ever I can. I believe you and know what this drug can do, both the good and the bad. Together we will win this battle, together we will survive, and together we will trust in freedom from this drug.

Keep reading, keep posting, and keep believing!
It is not you, it is the drug and you are NOT crazy!

Blessings
Jeff

[Lori]

at YOU Jeff!! Your excitement was bouncing off the computer!! I am very excited for you. Its great to read posts that make us all smile!! Thank you for updating us...dont even try to contain your excitement, it makes the post so much more fun to read!! I am soooooo glad you found the way that works for you. THANK YOU, GOD!!!

[jeff3298]

Thank you men, women, and familes of service men that gave everything they had to this Country, thank you for serving us Americans. I remember what you did and what your familes did, and what your Fathers and Mothers and Sons and Daughters did, and most of all what YOU did.


5.27mg. today
Well the wonderful day I had a few days ago is gone. Saturday I had a rough day with pain and same for today (Sunday). Every joint is flamed and I feel super achy all over and in a foggy cloud in my head. BUT I know that I know I had a good day and I WILL have more good days in the future. 5.27mg. today , that is amazing and Iam so glad this is working. Yes there is pain and foggyness but nothing like the cold turkey nor the fast taper I did. This pain is liveable and I know it will go away with time. My body, my brain, my nerves and every cell of my fiber are rebuilding and making me new. It takes weeks for some cells to renew and after two years every cell in your body had been rebuilt. Imagine a two year restoration of your body! If we put the best of the best nature has to offer in our bodies what it would be like in two years? Wow if only we were so disciplined.


Remember is is not you, it is the drug!
You are not CRAZY, it is the drug!
You can beat this, read, write, and keep pluged in.

Blessings and be healed

Jeff

[Lori]

I am sorry you are having a rough time of it, Jeff but I thank God you know this will pass, too. I have learned myself, that even when we are having good days to still TAKE IT EASY!! Reading the news, versus watching it on tv, is best for us, take it easy on the caffine, take a stroll, do some stretching exercises, possibly try reading a book, meditation, yoga or praying....we can feel ourselves healing, and each day we should try alittle harder to do things, but always remember that we are still healing. I think I am rambling, but I am sleepy and am trying to stay awake to watch the race. Have a wonderful, THE MOST AWESOME MEMORIAL DAY!!! (Tomorrow)

[sfessel]

I went on Cymbalta about 6 months ago. I saw the advertising on tv, went in to my doctor, and told her that I wanted to go on this drug. She didn't hesitate and she didn't ask questions. She only prescribed the medication as I had requested. I had been going through some depression and thought this drug was my answer. In the 6 months that I've been on this drug, I have rapidly gained 20 lbs.; lost my libido; lost all interest in social events and outings with friends; have become indifferent to things and events in my life. In other words, I am a zombie of paramount porportion! So, I woke up one day and said that I do not want to live life like this any longer. I have a gorgeous husband and fabulous children. They deserve more than mommy staying in bed every weekend. My youngest son asked me recently why I sleep so much. This really saddened me and I couldn't give him an answer. I cut my 60mg dosage in half for one week and then went cold-turkey. I have this whirling in my head that will not go away. I feel that I have motion sickness, the never-ending buzz, dizziness, etc. It is driving me nuts. I am iritable and anxious for nothing. The worse part is I decided to go off of this drug right before a trip to see the in-laws. Everyone is wondering where the "old self" went off to. The withdrawal off of this drug is very, very scary. I wish that I would have read all these posts before I told my doctor that I wanted to go on this drug. Right now, I feel hopeless that there is no end in sight and no relief in sight for these withdrawal symptoms. Do the symptoms ever go away. Will I ever return to my "normal" self. I rather be depressed than to be a zombie. This stuff is "satan-in-a-bottle!"

[jeff3298]

YES it will go away, you are not hopeless/ In fact you are so blessed and should be happy BECAUSE you found this website. Slap me now, I understand!!!!
Really, think about it, we are here, those of us who understand, who have been through what your going through!
WE ALL HAVE!
You are not CRAZY, you are no mommy psycho, it is this drug that has taken over our body.
If you are having a hard time, read the post, many of them and understand you are not alone!
I had to go back and restart the withdrawl several times before I found a way to do it, and so far this last taper has been doable!

You have more hope now than before you found this website and yes it will get better!EVERY minute you are alive is a minute farther from this drug.

Blessings
Jeff

[Lori]

I just wanted to check in with everyone. We had a busy weekend and unfortunately, we had to go and get my son and his wife from his dads house Monday night, because his dad was threatening to kill them both...simply because they spent Memorial Day, (Monday) with us and my family. This is not the first time this has happened, but this time, the abuse was escalated, so the kids are staying here, my boyfriend got my son another job (was working with his dad) working with him on his truck (starting Monday morning), and they will be getting there own place in about two weeks. I realize this has nothing to do with Cymbalta and I appologize....BUT I have handled everything pretty good, working hard to get their things out of their bedroom when his dad is at work so I may not have the chance to get on here for alittle while, but please know all of you are very much in my thoughts and prayers. You all have become very dear to me.

We were at my parents, preparing the food...etc....at 7:00AM and I did very well with everyone, but around 6:30 PM I could feel myself getting frustrated, but I stuck it out for another hour or so. I was exhausted when we got home, then to turn around and go help my son and his wife escape added alittle more frustration to the day, but I did fall asleep quickly and we all got a good nights rest. I am still taking care of myself, eating the right foods, especially since I will be quite busy getting the kids moved in here and then moved into their own place. TOO, I started the kidney cleanse this morning....so we will see how that goes.

I WILL READ EVERY POST I HAVE MISSED AS SOON AS I CAN!!!!
To all of the new ones, hang in there and I thank God you came to this message board.
YOU will get past this, take the advice you read here and go easy on your self.
Have a blessed day,
Lori

[mkhackler]

Hurray! This is the first time in 5 days I've been able to bring this board up. Have been wanting to post but not able to. So I'm going to cheat a little and paste an email I exchanged with Greybeard yesterday so that you all know what is going on. And just as a new thought regarding what I wrote him, yesterday was actually not a bad day for me. I kept myself very busy forcing the housework issue and then taking my 3 handsome grandsons and there dad (my son) out to dinner. Anyway here is what I wrote Greybeard:

Have been trying to post on the board for 4 days now and can't get on it. Nothing much has changed as far as the pain I have. Doctor now convinced more than ever that I developed RA while on cymbalta, and that because cymbalta also is used for pain management that it was masking/covering up the RA until I went cold turkey. It has now been 45 days since I swallowed my last cymbalta and my physical health continues to decline. And since I don't have health insurance it is to expensive to get to RA specialist at this time. I take a pain pill every 4-5 hours, I take Neurotin 3 times a day for nerve pain in feet and legs and I take 1200 mgs. of Omega 3 once a day. I don't leave the house hardly at all just because it is hard to get around. Did go out to dinner with son last night, and will have to leave the house Thursday for eye appointment (having double vision ?). But other than that, that is about it. Thank you for asking about me, and when I can get on the board will post. Hope you are still doing well and have made it all the way through the tunnel. Take care.

Hope everyone has a great day........

Mary in beautiful Denver

[mkhackler]

Hi again all. Want to add a postscript to what I posted earlier. I called my doctor's office yesterday morning to report that I did not seem to be doing alot better, that joint pain was returning, muscle fatigue and heaviness in legs were bad and nerve pain bad. I wanted to know what he wanted me to do at this point. Mentioned I may be approved for health care plan on Friday. Wanted him to give me a referral to a specialists-someone he thought could help me out. I didn't want to just let fingers do the walking through the yellow pages. I figured he's been a doctor for a very long time-at least 25 years now (we went to junior high together) so he should have someone to reccomend to me. Guess what? He said just find any pain management specialist. What the heck happened to the RA specialist? What happened to the neurologist? Both of which he said I should see last week. Do I now NOT have RA? Do I now NOT have Pariphial Neuropathy? I'M GOING TO PULL MY HAIR OUT ONE STRAND AT A TIME! Doctor's just so suck it's amazing. Fine, give me pain pills and I will deal with whatever is going on by my self with no help from my doctor of almost 11 years.

I'm actually feeling pretty good today again. Joint pain at minimum, able to take a decent (not great) walk early, have been up and down stairs a few times, trugging with more housework. Legs still very heavy like they are made of led, but then the last 2 nights I have slept so deep and so hard that could be a part of leg heaviness. I can't figure things out. I suppose I just have to let time take it's place. I mean it would be great if I don't have RA or that other thing I can't spell. So is it possible that because I was on 120 mgs. of cymbalta everyday for 9 months and went cold turkey that it is just going to take me longer to recover? Day 46 today. I have until February before unemployment runs out, so that will give me a total of about 10 months from the time I quit the Sin-balta to recover. Think I'll make it???? Sure as hell hope so.

Bye for now..........

Lori!!!! I think sense of humor is slowly coming back again.

[jeff3298]

1.15mg. Today
Wow I had some doubts I would ever get this far but I am here. I have had lots of pain these last few days, my entire body is screaming at me, unfortunitly I cannot repeat what it is saying, something like #$%^#$%#$%^#$@#^%&&*(&*!

A couple of hours ago I had a clearness and a bright moment in my head, it was nice while it lasted. I have been having a real hard time concentrating and focusing on anything this week, gee I wonder why?

Well I have one more dose .46mg. Yes POINT 46 mg. The capsule weighs more than the drug (6 granules) inside.

My wife asked me this morning how long the pain last, I wish I knew, anyone have that crystal ball available?

Well I need to get back to work.

REMEMBER it is not you, it is the drug!

You are not crazy!

Lastly be blessing and read the post and threads and learn everything you can about this drug!

Jeff

[Sarah J]

Jeff - so glad that you have made it this far. Hang in there and be strong.

It does stop. Because it has to eventually!! Be strong.

[schmb01]

Yay Jeff!! My pain has lessened, but I think it was the vitamin D deficiency that was part of it.

Check out the nutrition area, and look at the posts for vitamin D and for B12. It is really startling what you will feel when you are deficient in these key nutrients/hormones. It may not be the answer for you, but what the heck, wouldn't it be great if it was something as simple as a couple of supplements?

I'm so proud of you and how far you have come, and amazed that you were able to wean to such a low dose! Dang, that says something by itself!

[mkhackler]

Wow. What a day. It started off pretty good. Only took 2 hours instead of 3 to get moving around decently. Even managed to put in a walk outside for a few blocks. I was proud of myself as it is hard to walk around the house. But ever since about 1:00 my calve muscles are knotted up and throbing. I've also been having a pretty steady sweat going on even though it was relatively cool today. Checked temperature and I'm running a fever now. When I had called the stupid, dough head, doctor yesterday I told his medical assistant that I thought maybe was getting a slight infection in chest. Did the dumb butt do anything? No! And I think he is full of cr-- that I have RA. Think he just is playing guessing games. Sick of it. Yep, I'm angry tonight. :evil: Tomorrow's another day though.

[Lori]

One hour at a time, Mary, but I am glad you atleast feel like doing a few things and even posting again. My thoughts and prayers are with you through this difficult time.

[mkhackler]

Good morning all. Day 48 since going cold turkey from 120 mgs. of "the drug", and hanging in there, or least trying to. Yesterday was NOT good, but wasn't due to the pain so much as it was other things. Immodium AD and the bathroom were my best friends from 5:30 to about 10:30 in the morning. What a way to start the day. Got that taken care of only to be hit with a severe tension headache, and that right before appointment with eye doctor. Had a full eye exam which ment dialating my eyes and having those little bright lights shine in which upped the headache even more. But I got some awsome new glasses at 50% off! The one thing that is a constant is the nerve pain in feet which I can not shake. I'm not going to take anymore Neurontin because it just makes me sick. But the Prednisone which I am almost done with (1/2 a tablet for next 3 days) has helped with joint pain so much. I'm just scared that once the drug is out of system joint pain will return, but Greybeard said his dad has been put on it and it seems to last a long time. I'm hoping that is the case with me. Then we just have the muscles weakness and pain, and nerve pain to deal with. And this morning I find out if I qualify for the medical care program I've mentioned. Appointment at 10:30. It would be a blessing if I get approved.

Anyway, so I have the appointment this morning, then since I can't find any friends that want to go with me tonight, I am taking myself to an afternoon movie to see Sex in the City, which I am a huge fan of the show. So very excited about the movie. It will be nice just to go somewhere fun even if it is by myself. No plans for weekend. But for those of us that don't work, the weekends are really no different than the weekdays. It's just one day at a time.

Hope this post finds everyone doing well and improving. And I hope that everyone has a fabulous weekend! We all deserve fabulous days everyday though. Don't you agree?

Ta-Ta for now

Mary in beautiful, sunny, Denver

[jeff3298]

.46mg. yesterday and ZERO Today!!!!! FREEDOM!!!!
I made it! I have pain and fogginess but I see hope. The pain is not as sharp as it has been and it is more all over instead of the joints prmarly. I have flashes of clearness now and then, seconds at a time but they are happening. It is like I poke my head above the clouds breifly before I sink back down. This is a much better way to go than doing the cold turkey for me anyway.

There is HOPE, yes you can get off this drug. There is life after this drug! Patience is needed and to outsmart this drug. Find away around it so to speak. I tried cold turkey, almost killed me, I tried a fast taper 30mg to 15mg and it was really bad. Then I tried a modified Catherine Taper and it worked. I had some rough days but nothing like CT. And no brain ZAPS YEA!!!!!Just a lot of PAIN YUK!

If you are new to this please read as much as you can on this website and learn as much as you can and LISTIEN to your body.

1. It is not you that is doing this it is the drug!
2. You are not crazy.
3. You are not the only one, we all have been there and done it, experienced it and know what is going on with you.
4. You have found support, here on this website, REAL HONEST people who care.
5. There is hope, you found it here.

I will touch back in a few days.
Jeff