NM - I can understand that you need to play it safe with the neighbour at present. The last thing you want is to ruffle feathers and cause a division between the two of you - that can have some nasty results. As you say, hopefully she will do the off and this will play out nicely in your favour.
Hmmmm, the death of a loved one can easily bring on this sort of thing; I am sorry for your loss. What you describe sounds like classic symptoms. In bad times, I feel the same as my wife does not drive, so if for any reason I could not drive, then we would be stranded. It would be interesting to know what it is that you fear - for example what would prevent you from getting home, what the noise and atmosphere would lead to in such an exposure. We can PM if you'd prefer. I have done a lot of legwork with this sort of thing and woud like to help you where I can.
LDN - bless him - has gone through every disease known to man. It would be a miracle for someone to have come through everything that he has done without some level of mental health ailment. Again, I love that we can all take encouragement from each others efforts.
As Kath says, we are the best forum on the t'Interweb 
Oh, and cats generally do not wind dogs up, no. They are solitary creatures and would not give a flying wotsit about the dog. A dog would piss a cat off for sure, but the dog will get the message pretty quick and would not retaliate vocally. Had a few of both, and at the same time, so hope that helps!
